Thank you, Mr Fieri. That's quite enough.

*shudder*

It is, but that's really not sci-fi. I was thinking more along the lines of The Crystal World or The Drowned World.

Spending two hours with Sam Worthington isn't dystopian enough for you?

I've said it before and I'm sure I'll say it again, but what we need right now is a few well done JG Ballard adaptations.

That headline made me think someone was airing a JG Ballard biopic. Now I'm angry.

Normally I'd agree, but there's always a place for a Benny Schwaz update.

He bled to death in your town, just a few steps from your own front door. If only you had known, you could have saved him. But your ignorance doomed him. I hope you're happy.

It happens to a lot of men, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. Just get some rest and we'll try again later.

Go on…

That skill saved me just now.

The period at the end of that sentence makes you look insincere, Mr Threepwood

Boston Strong!

Wasn't he also, er, entertaining himself out there?

It would be crueler to let a Republican live; the world is just going to keep looking less and less like what he/she thinks it should.

Think of it as payback for American Idol.

I'm just looking forward to hearing the worst of these turned into a dull and seemingly interminable podcast.

I'd add The Drowned World to that list. I really think a Ballard renaissance on film could be the tonic we need in an age of biannual Marvel and Star Wars films.

This is just…tired and dull and uninteresting.

Repeatedly, and with gusto.