If he’s actually embarrassed he shouldn’t be. I mean, if my body (and dick) looked that good I'd rarely wear clothes at all. Proudly.

This would be the subject of the missing verse from TLC’s “Scrubs,” right?

He might be hung like a can of Monster.

A couple of years ago cops were called about a fight in a hotel room. Guests heard shouting or something. When the police showed up they found Evan with a bloody nose and bite marks on him, so they arrested Emma. But he didn’t press charges. Or get her out of his life, apparently :(

Bloom: “Hey, Miranda. Just a head’s up. The most embarrassing photos you can imagine of me are going to be coming out. You’ve been warned”

I really want Evan Peters to love himself. I want to sit him down and try to make him understand that there are so many interesting and beautiful and successful women out there ready and willing to put their mouth on his dick. Ready and willing preparing themselves so long for that moment. So, why are with this girl…

Nice to see that the singer from Smashmouth is gainfully employed and is subjected to seeing Calvin in his Calvins on daily basis.

In the middle of a police standoff.

They went to the Aquarium by the CN Tower and he got her a stuffed shark?

Laughing at Chris Brown’s lame ass?

A through lack of common sense. I can’t with him, if that’s true. That’s just beyond stupid.

Remember when he threw a desk chair out a window at the Good Morning America studios, sending it and shattered glass straight into Times Square - with no legal ramifications? Still throwing stuff out of windows, I see.

What’s honestly surprising is that he hasn’t killed someone yet.

Also: with felony assault and other convictions, this tool is the perfect example of someone who shouldn’t have been allowed to own a gun in the first place. You put a gun in the hands of someone with the emotional control of a small child and a proven record of violence and menacing toward women, and this was a…

$$$$

He calls it “ironic” that the cops are at his home.

He just won joint custody I think.

Speaking of sucking farts out of asses...

I hope he enjoys prison, since that’s clearly where he wants to be.