Sweet oil sheen over the entire surface.

I'm not a Scion connoiseur by any stretch of the imagination, but I can promise you that xB thing still looks oh-so-boxy. I moved recently, and used a number of boxes. Some of their corners have been abused, and so they're not perfectly square. They're still boxes, and nobody is mistaking them nor the xB as being…

With the US economy tanking, increasing involvement in world conflicts, and tightening environmental standards, Scandinavia is increasingly looking like the white suburbanite's (me!) ideal escape.

There you have it Jalops, there is officially no reason to go to the midwest.

No use in over-analyzing? Well that bridge just got burned.

Valentine's vitriol extends beyond just this incident. During the Yankees games I've had the thrill of listening to him broadcast, he harps on any little thing he can find, no matter how small. It gets old fast when the talking heads spends nine innings griping about everything they see. Valentine needs to be…

Buddy had a Taurus Wagon that I drove one time. I think it weighed six thousand pounds, and the transmission (still in good shape) took a full second before the power transferred to the wheels. But man, we managed to fit, what, thirty cases of champagne into it for a sunday mixer/brunch, and it only bottomed out…

I wish I could afford to commission Dartz to do a custom car. Just imagine the conversation starter they could produce! I'd have to move to Cali just to be able to fit in.

Finally a reason to visit Iowa!

Any rap song or meme set to farm equipment is still awesome. See: Galifianakis.

But it DOESN'T look like every Porshe ever- this one has Jalopnik stickers on the rocker panels.

Makes you realize how many great/famous events in history need some more levity!

Any old Aston Martin. If the South hates Yankees, imagine what they must feel about the British! This would make for some hilarious parking lot/infield fights.

I still remember being disappointed when I learned there was no possibility of a purchase of a 1983 Corvette. Well, unless you count breaking into the NCM to retrieve the only one.

Next year's model will include yet another switch on the console, which will be Drag Race Mode, which either locks out reverse gear or just does it all for you, and you can sit on the sidelines and enjoy your mocha.

I'll say it: if you own a supercar and live in London currently and still park it on the street, you deserve every little bit of harm that comes to it for the astounding lack of common sense you're displaying.

Somewhere between British Racing Green and suicide you find... Elkhart Green.

I was behind one of these just the other day. I think most of humanity may have been forcing it out of their memory.

It's official: toughest job out there is working at T10 studios.

I assumed, possibly wrongly, that most people weren't angry about the trucks populating the roads. I never get pissed at big rigs going slow or pulling in front of me to give more room to a crew working on the guard rail or whatever. I would think, hope, that people who know anything about cars would have half a…