"And to the woman to whom this human diarrhea pile directed his steaming ego turd..."

"So is going on a hike the worst seemingly-innocent blind date activity you can think of?"

He was transported to the rehab center by a Mayflower moving truck.

I, for one, welcome our new Bee overlords.

That's no fun. :D

Not necessarily.

this week on Ow My Balls

"In other words, maybe more porn searches means it's more dangerous for gays, not that there are more gays."

"Got it, got it, need it, got it, don't want it, got it, got it, oh jesus what the hell is that... need it. Got it."

I don't so much have a problem with these, I guess. I don't know. What I really want to know is if they give out a how-to manual with the pumps, such as this one:

"former Virginia governor George Allen, who's now being paid as a consultant to defend the team name."

I thought that was the women's room.

I find the idea that different methods of murder isn't something that can be supported by evidence or anecdote. It's just as likely, if not more so, that the perpetrator was targeting one for a specific manner of death and the other was, I hate to put it this way, a throw-away.

I have this as my banner image on facebook. yeah.

It's like wearing nothing at all... nothing at all... nothing at all...

"Genre is a flat circle."

Can we stop trying to make Kinja a thing? It's not a thing.

The email of the week proves why south is the worst direction.

Even as a parent and having to have 2 kids in the house for snow days, I'll still take the snow day over going to the office. Seriously, I just don't understand my fellow federal gov't employees who gripe about closures. Jeebus people, this is a freaking perk of being a fed, quite yer bitching and enjoy the day off!

New favorite: blueberry frosted mini-wheats. All the goodness of frosted mini-wheats AND blueberry? Done.