The Power Of Community: When This Town Discovered One Of Its Neighbors Was Walking 70 Miles A Day To Masturbate In The Forest, It Came Together And Bought Him A Lamborghini So He Could Drive There In Style

If you’re tired of all the negative stories in the news these days, here’s something that’ll make you smile for a change: When this town discovered one of its neighbors was walking 70 miles a day to masturbate in the forest, it came together and bought him a Lamborghini so he could drive there in style!

No Big News For Bagels: The Bagel Industry Just Issued Its Daily 600-Page Report On The State Of The Bagel Industry And Nothing Major Has Changed Since Yesterday

Bagel fans can take it easy today, because the bagel industry just issued its daily 600-page report on the state of bagels, and nothing big has changed since yesterday. The phonebook-sized volume, which is published every day in 76 countries around the world in 254 languages, reported this morning that pretty much…

4 Encounters Between An Alien Civilization And A U.S. President That Didn’t Matter And Were A Big Waste Of Time

As the leader of the free world, the president of the United States is often the first person extraterrestrials will seek out when they want to make contact with Earth, but on the rare occasions when this happens, those meetings are almost never of consequence. Here are four encounters throughout history between a…

4 Episodes of ‘Modern Family’ Where Manny Married A 90-Year-Old Woman Who Kept Him In A Birdcage And His Parents Forced Him To Get A Divorce

‘Modern Family’ has given us so many wonderful memories over the years and it’s always great to go back and revisit some of the greatest moments of this unforgettable show. Here are the four episodes of ‘Modern Family’ where Manny Delgado decides to marry a 90-year-old woman who kept him in a birdcage, and his…

He Did Kindly Arrive! The Rock Dwayne Johnson Just BLASTED His Car Through The Wall Of This Daycare Center To Show The Toddlers His Long, Gray Wizard’s Beard

Yes it is! At last you will know true joy and unending rapture in the form of this story of heartwarming joy and celebrity kindness: International mega-man The Rock Dwayne Johnson just BLASTED his car through the wall of a daycare center to show the toddlers his long, gray wizard’s beard!

ClickHole Is Experimenting With Non-Viral Content That Nobody Wants To Click On, So Here Are Some Pictures Of Unremarkable Crows

For many glorious years, ClickHole.com has proudly churned out the internet’s most clickable, shareable content on a daily basis. This content goes viral and spreads all over the internet so that ClickHole can rake in the huge amounts of money that it deserves. However, today this glamorous website is experimenting…