Return Of The Fucking King: This College Freshman Poked His Whole Head Into His Old AP Lit Teacher's Room Right In The Middle Of Class

For the students in Mr. Friedman’s AP Lit class, what started as a normal, boring lesson just turned into an unforgettable experience that everyone in attendance will undoubtedly be talking about for years to come: Connor Hanson, a college freshman who was in Mr. Friedman’s class last year, just poked his whole…

GoT Fans Rejoice: George R.R. Martin Says He Can Now Finish The Winds Of Winter Since Geico Has Given Him Legal Clearance To Use Their Gecko Mascot As A Character

Game Of Thrones fans who have been eagerly awaiting the next installment in the book series finally have a reason to celebrate: George R.R. Martin says that he can now finish The Winds Of Winter because Geico has finally given him legal clearance to use their gecko mascot as a character!

Incredible Breakthrough: Medical Researchers At Harvard Have Discovered A Way To Put A Dead Patient’s Brain In The Microwave While They Have Sex With Each Other On The Floor

A group of scientists at one of America’s top universities just made an incredible breakthrough that will change the way doctors practice medicine forever. Medical researchers at Harvard University have discovered a way to put a dead patient’s brain in the microwave while they have sex with each other on the floor.

Hot Hot Hollywood: Armie Hammer Has Removed His Toupee In Church And Is Using The Severed Leg Of A Flamingo To Push It Toward A Scared Little Boy

A hot new celebrity sighting is getting splattered all over the tabloids and it’s got absolutely everyone talking: According to gossip and beautiful paparazzi photos, movie star heart throb Armie Hammer has removed his toupee in church and is using the severed leg of a flamingo to push it across the floor toward a…

A Tragic Loss: 6 Astronauts On The International Space Station Have Died While Attempting To Wear Witch Costumes In Space For Halloween

Millions are in mourning today following a deadly Halloween-related incident that claimed the lives of some of the world’s bravest and most accomplished space explorers: Officials have confirmed that six astronauts on board the International Space Station died today after attempting to wear witch costumes in space to…

Leading A Double Life: This Guy Who Seems Pretty Normal For The Most Part Also Knows A Ton About Local High School Football

Sometimes in life, it’s the most ordinary and unassuming people who turn out to be anything but. This seems to be exactly the case for 32-year-old Jason Shepherd, who is a thoroughly normal guy in every regard except for one: He apparently knows a ton about local high school football and gets really into it.

Did ‘Sesame Street’ Go Too Far With Its Episode Where Ernie Microwaves Himself While The Words ‘NO LESSON TODAY’ Flash On-Screen?

Sesame Street has been delighting and educating children for decades, but the beloved show may have crossed the line yesterday with a controversial creative decision that has some parents furious. Did Sesame Street go too far with its episode where Ernie microwaves himself while the words “NO LESSON TODAY” flashed on…

The Power Of Community: When This Town Discovered One Of Its Neighbors Was Walking 70 Miles A Day To Masturbate In The Forest, It Came Together And Bought Him A Lamborghini So He Could Drive There In Style

If you’re tired of all the negative stories in the news these days, here’s something that’ll make you smile for a change: When this town discovered one of its neighbors was walking 70 miles a day to masturbate in the forest, it came together and bought him a Lamborghini so he could drive there in style!

No Big News For Bagels: The Bagel Industry Just Issued Its Daily 600-Page Report On The State Of The Bagel Industry And Nothing Major Has Changed Since Yesterday

Bagel fans can take it easy today, because the bagel industry just issued its daily 600-page report on the state of bagels, and nothing big has changed since yesterday. The phonebook-sized volume, which is published every day in 76 countries around the world in 254 languages, reported this morning that pretty much…

4 Encounters Between An Alien Civilization And A U.S. President That Didn’t Matter And Were A Big Waste Of Time

As the leader of the free world, the president of the United States is often the first person extraterrestrials will seek out when they want to make contact with Earth, but on the rare occasions when this happens, those meetings are almost never of consequence. Here are four encounters throughout history between a…

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