Limiting the amount of money individuals can donate to a campaign used to have bipartisan appeal. Good luck living in your country sold to the highest bidder.

He says there shoe-shine stand would be more lucrative—but only because the government can’t track his income from it. I feel for the guy tremendously, but I also wonder why he can’t get a job as a Walmart greeter to supplement his income. Is he working 40 hours a week writing? It’s hard to judge when I’m just a guy…

Therapists will often have you perform a similar ritual and physically tear up your destructive thoughts. You should try it.

Coach was a Capulet.

Listen, their company makes more money than yours. Get over it. Do you all fight over who gets the anti-Buzzfeed assignment for the week?

ALLEGED! ALLEGED SEX LIFE!

It’s pretty easy to run Clinton’s numbers, seeing as how nothing will change when she’s president.

I believe for a fact that I do not believe you.

You have a Fifth Amendment right to not incriminate yourself, but you must generally assert it at the earliest opportunity (even in a civil forum) or the privilege is waived.

The former prosecutor’s email suggests that the deposition cannot be used because he (the former prosecutor) would be called to testify “as to…

What evidence would be sufficient for you to believe Italian olive oil is adulterated? Do the Italian firms need to admit it?

Another fun fact about T.J. Simers: he never graduated college. Can you imagine anyone dropping out of college today winning $1.8 million for future economic damages?