Glad this isn't about you then.

shes the best mess this family has produced ever. it's gonna get really good really soon. she's only 17, ya'll.

fuck it, im feeling the song.

:in Hozier's voice: AAAMENNN! AAAAAMMMENNN! Take me to church

sometimes i think about all the stuff i want to buy myself. or the stuff i have in the car that i need to return.

Lies are the glue in most marriages - including mine. if i told him the absolute truth about everything, i don't think we would be married anymore. that's just a fact.

left

mark wahlbrrg needs some mentos.

i've been waiting on shade court! let the glory commence!

sick son of a bitch. they should douse him with an accelerant and set him on fire - then spray him with an extinguisher - then do it again and again.

delayed shade is everything!

My MIL insisted/berated me until i choose the dress she loved/paid for that i was, at best, lukewarm about. My mother was a selfish monster during the whole event. there was a lot of "me, me, me" and she actually showed up late to my wedding. During the fitting, she made comments about every dress i put on and called…

Inbreeding.

and i also slept with a plumber who also moonlighted as a hairdresser. he cleans your pipes then styles your hair. zing!

eyes closed, lights off, saran wrap.

winner.

oh god, this is happening.

totally fucking. Gillian Anderson and Jamie Dornan - not this basic bitch.

basic bitches fighting it out in court. what a waste of space.

it's too painful to watch twice.