When I was in college, I spent a summer interning in New York. My parents flew to visit me one weekend, and we had breakfast in Greenwich Village. Well, holy shit, Ethan Hawke was seated right next to us after we'd been there for a bit. He was alone with his daughter, who would have been about 2 at the time. I'm…

I like to pretend she did that to him in real life, too.

But is Engelbert dead or alive?

He's lucky that dog didn't go after the ball.

But...why are so many people recording themselves doing yoga? It can't be purely for my enjoyment of their pets interrupting.

I will NOT watch Empire, no matter how much everyone loves it. Ugh, I can't watch anything with Terrence Howard without thinking of what a bag of dicks he is.

I still haven't brought myself to watch the final season of Jason Katims' other amazing show, Friday Night Lights, because I don't want it to end. I don't know how I'm going to get through tonight.

This one was clearly taken after he had come back from a good cry in the bathroom. SOMETIMES YOU JUST HAVE TO LET IT OUT, JAMIE.

Maybe we should stop comparing him to Adele and compare him to Lena Dunham, then.

You forgot to use the word "pandering." Buzzfeed had a post about this yesterday, and seriously 90% of the tweets used that word.

Bacon bacon. Francis Bacon. Bacon salt.

Well, duh, they all know each other!

So, this guy thought Shatner created Priceline? I mean, we all know Matthew McConaughey invented Lincolns, but not every spokesperson is so talented.

I've been avoiding watching this because saccharine and sympathetic embarrassment, but these kids are good! Great moves.

You win.

I feel like he's going, "You know I hate waiting in the car, so I'm going to do this until you come back. It's time to goooooooo!"

I can't stop watching this dog. I don't know why, but it just makes me giggle so much.

But it's still okay for me to call 911 if McDonald's is out of nuggets, right?

My first question was, "Is that a wax figure of Reg?"

After I posted, I realized I didn't need the adjective. I'm so fucking wordy.