Can one fucking person just ask him this in public? “If he was so dumb, aren’t you dumb for hiring him?” I know it won’t change any minds but it’s maddening he just goes on with his business every time he says something dumb. 

You forget why Tillerson was selected. Forgivable entirely, because the news cycle around Trump moves faster than a silverfish across your bathroom floor.

It’s an interference penalty, but not much more than that. The reason Wilson got himself concussed is that he clearly did not have his helmet on properly, so his head banged against some solid ice.

In a just world, Santorum would be the village idiot, cleaning sewers and privies for food scraps in between his inevitable sentencing to the public stocks for public lewdness and drunkenness. I refuse to watch CNN because of their insistence on hiring buffoonish shills like Santorum in chase of the mythical, centrist,…

No one is pissed off at you. We just think you’re a bunch of laughable easily-swindled idiots. The most charitable way to put it is that we pity you.

Well, it has been much, much easier to spot mouth breathing idiots because of him, so I guess, yeah, he has made a difference. 

“It is time to bring this inquiry to a conclusion,” Giuliani said. 

I half expected this sophomore-level writing project to end like

I’d bet he’d have a hard time picking out most of the red states on a map of the US, even with borders. 

Throw on some makeup and a wig, and that’s the face. Even the disturbing smile is on point.

When I was in sixth grade, I was singled out by the kids in my class for bullying, on the grounds that I wore Reebok sneakers matched with Nike socks. It stopped when one of the kids reached down to try and pull up my pants and see what my socks looked like, only for me to try and kick him in the face.

Conservatives have this bizarre fascination with thinking that people can’t be poor because they have something that’s nice. People on welfare can’t really be poor if they have cell phones or refrigerators. That kind of shit. Like, maybe she bought it a long time ago? Maybe someone gave it to her? Maybe she just takes…

If Scott Walker ate shit would that make him a cannibal?

Laws should be applied to the whole of society, not just because you can’t handle your shit. 

Trump is the embodiment of the American Dream for a depressing number of people in this country. It’s not so much the money or power, but having enough of it that it can allow you to say an infinite number of stupid things without threat to your status or livelihood.

We will never be the “good guy with a gun.” The 2nd amendment was never written “for us” it was written to protect “them” from “us.” 

Anyone wanna know all that I know about Tommy Boy?

You... uh... go, guy.

“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.”

Are they using a microwave oven as the podium?