If your therapist is qualified to work with people who have survived abuse, she will need to be able to deal with substance abuse issues. There's somewhat of a meme in the mental health community - that trauma and substance abuse"go together like peanut butter and jelly."

25.

Fuck off, having bipolar disorder doesn't make you sexually abusive.

Hey, now! Don'tcha know.

Ok, fine. That doesn't change the fact that using violence as discipline with a child teaches them that violence is an acceptable solution to problems. I grew up with violence (from one parent), and unlearning that has been a lifelong project.

Whoa. Alabama is more terrifying than I thought. Remind me to especially never go there.

Was his name Dennis?

The infographic does not say that any alcohol or other drugs make a person unable to consent. It is visual, but it could just as easily be interpreted as, "You need to consider whether this person is too drunk or high to consent."

The thing is, drinking and driving turns out totally fine for everyone most of the time. That is why people do it, because they think "this time" will be one of those times. Rape does not turn out that way in reality, because there is always a victim. It's not, "There's a small, but still significant, chance there…

If the messages are truly internalized, you don't want to do anything that goes against them when you're drunk. Do you find yourself actively having to prevent yourself from kicking puppies when you get drunk?

Ooh. Also not cool.

Hadn't she thrown up out a window minutes before from being too drunk? Are you saying there should have been an investigation into whether or not she had the flu?

Thanks for your awesome response!

You could say nothing.

If women become obsessed with pleasing men, it's clearly just'cause they're stupid, right?

So you think research is necessary to define what exists outside of academia? Aight.

I'm going to be totally honest, here. This is why some women are freaking out about this - because apparently being close to someone does not mean understanding that person's point of view for a jarring number of men. From my perspective, at least, that constitutes an appalling lack of capacity (or desire?) for…

And even the most conservative estimates place the number of female rapists at about the same rate that women identify as lesbian or bi.

I'm sorry there's no rush to do research with the hypothesis that lesbians are more likely to rape than straight women? ...Sorry, lesbians? If you really want it done, do it yourself.

Don't you want to know what your partner's experience is like on a phenomenological level, though? Isn't that part of a desire to be close to someone?