It’s just Mac asking where Chase Utley went to, that’s all.

“Now, I know that there’s been a lot of people who have been questioning my leadership, and the decisions I have made. And sadly, I’ve had a talk with the Governor, and as of today, I have tendered my resignation. I appreciate the fact that all of you have worked so hard to make the DHS one of the best run divisions…

There is no truth to the internal rumor, at the moment at least, that Foxhoven would be brought back to head the DHS as a hologram.

Man, I hate Cubs fans. This kinda seals it.

You know how they have a Designated Survivor for the SOTU in case something terrible happens to all of the line of succession?*

They need a Designated Person Who Always Jumps Out As 45th Is Rounding A Corner And Yells AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

*and yes, I am basing this off of the TV show, I don’t even know if it’s a real thing,…

Dude’s absolutely getting workman’s comp for his injuries, isn’t he? Despite not being on duty when he got hit. They’ll figure out a way. 

Seriously, someone needs to investigate Dana White, the UFC, and weight cutting in general. This isn’t the first time I’ve seen people trying to cut weight looking like this, and I’ve heard a lot of horror stories about the process of doing so. It’s insane. I have to assume the same thing may happen in boxing, but it…

Oh, also, the fact that he decided to make a show and check the arm he used after clubbing Williams on the head, because OW THAT HURT ME, THE PERSON YOU SHOULD BE CONCERNED ABOUT!

Fuck that squinty faced asshole.

The best part is that he missed both of his free throws before he did that.

Gizmodo, is there any way to get your new hedge fund overlords to implement a block feature, please? How much would the subscription be to get that already?

4/10, face isn’t small enough.

The yearly investment is definitely a turn off, but, with a lot of yearly service fees, it’s kinda nice to not have to worry when the monthly fee is coming up on something when you love paycheck to paycheck. As long as you’re aware of when it renews and didn’t catch you by surprise with a $200 bill.

I still have (had?) MoviePass, and honestly, it’s paid for itself with the amount of times I saw movies in the last few months. Saw Far From Home on Tuesday, and now I’m glad I got it in under the deadline. Was hoping to go see Midsommar this weekend, but that’s out of the picture.

Or see the treads as it crushes you. (2021 Edition)

The fact that lightning did not strike and kill hundreds of these goons, including our Ghoul President, is all the evidence you need that there is no God. I mean, all of the elements were there for the most ironic sendoff ever. Full stop, change my mind.

2 things:

I wish I could body this asshole in the worse, worse possible way.

I’m allergic to shellfish.

Take your star.

$113 Million to sign 3 power forwards...and they drafted 2 forwards right off the bat.

...Madison Square Garden is going to burn down tomorrow for the insurance money.