“It’s not the size of your dwelling that matters, it’s the willingness to be grateful for all the lemons life gives you. Don’t squeeze hard on the lemons though, you’ll have lemon juice all over yourself which makes you a prime target for flesh-eating rats.”

You might be a closet furry.

Khaki Konsistency

Fookin’ Aye!

You should’ve split it into multiple grimoire comments.

Is Barry the only one working today? Deadspin is becoming Puckspin (a good thing as a hockey fan), but I’m sure there’ll be a lot of “Hoc-key, durr?” comments being typed up today.

I said hot take, not sensible take.

My hot take on this: Don’t expect your club to pay millions of Euros/Pounds on first class players if you’re not willing to pay the price of admission.

Don’t expect the only hockey blogger on this website who happens to be a Rangers fan to acknowledge this.

I just go straight to the comments from people who ALSO clearly didn’t read the article, but are mad about the article anyway.

When “Russian” and “truck” are mentioned in the same sentence, two things come to mind:

So they’re basically real life PC Principals?

Great minds think alike.

Nice to see Jim Tomsula has found employment and gets to sleep under the same bridge every night.

Did his plan including transferring Juan Mata as soon as possible?

I just made a poopy... in my pants.

Is the sequel George W. Bush Jenga?

Did Samer find a winter boo yet?

Peyton stores all his HGH in BB-8.

The guy on the right will appreciate the Velveeta Cheese Fountain. And that’s no joke, there will be a Velveeta Cheese Fountain during the All Star Weekend.