Dear Internet,

Somebody tell me I'll look back on my time spent getting my master's degree one day and say, "Wow, that sure went fast." Because right now it feels very, very slow. :/

Bad: Someone stole my credit card info and went on a shopping spree. So that is NOT FUN.

What kind of asshat?

My husband and I celebrated Valentines by trying a vibrating cock ring. Good for us both, better for me than for him. Woo hoo! I just had to tell someone.

I never thought of it that way...

Today, a dude I knew from a summer camp in 2005 comes out of nowhere and posted on my facebook wall like "HAPPY VALENTINES DAY, here's a semi-flirty copy/paste from an email you wrote me in 2006, I miss you". UGHGHGHGHGHGHGHHHH. I tried to laugh it off like 'haha wow I don't remember the context for that at all!' and…

I would buy little Valentine's cards, like the kinds kids would buy for school, and give them to people I worked with.

Yeah, as someone who's been that person for people in my life I can tell you that it really hurts to then get pushed out of their lives because you're a reminder of that hard time. Whoever that was, s/he did it out of love and now it's your turn to be generous by keeping them in your life and working (maybe with…

Painful anniversaries are...well, painful! And when they come at a time when everyone else seems to be having a good time and celebrating basically happiness, it's definitely compounded.

Here's the thing, which you already know because you had a wedding: guest lists suck. Receptions and food are insanely expensive and the guest list needs to be trimmed over and over to save money. When I don't get invited to weddings I just keep this in mind and shrug. She's not one of your nearest and dearest. She's…

Wow that dude was a jerk. I dated a guy about this time last year and the sex/chemistry was okay (he was a very good kisser!) but didn't much like him otherwise. I never did get to dump him because I liked someone else and he noticed and then dumped ME because he said he didn't come second or some shit. It was cool.…

This was helping to such a level that it included paying for my underwear and dealing with emotional outbursts like shrieking, sobbing and just insanity because of depression. I don't think I'm ever going to be able to see this person without being reminded of that and feeling embarrassed. Ugh.

I honestly think your best course is to let your own natural nails grow out — pretty much any long-wear fake nail stuff is going to damage them and keep them weak. I did acrylics and glue-ons for a while, and they made my nails like effing tissue paper.

I ran into a high school of mine and she gave me her # telling me to catch up. We texted back and forth sometimes for an hour at a time and then I invited her to coffee and she still hasn't gotten back to me.

Confession: I like Valentine's Day. I think it's just another excuse to do something fun, whether you're in a relationship or not. Today I'm going to a comedy show with my sister to see Carly Aquilino, and then going home and eating the chocolate her long distance boyfriend sent to her.

A quick follow up on my escort escapades.

February 14th is a really difficult day for me for reasons unrelated to but compounded by Valentine's Day. It's the anniversary of not one, but two traumatic and painful events in my life, and having it fall on a day that is impossible to just lose on the calendar makes it that much harder to face every year. It…

Most women don't know they are pregnant until a few weeks after a missed period and drink and smoke until they realize pregnancy is a possibility. My ob/gyn answered (when I asked that very question) that she had never seen a case of fetal alcohol syndrome that was the result of a mother drinking up until the time she…

The other night, fiancé and I got drunk on several bottles of wine and practiced our first dance (we tie the knot six months from today, as it happens!)