as this is the internet, i suspect by this time next year we’ll all be driving down Freeway McRoadFace.

Tennis coverage has been oustanding lately. Keep it up.

I used to do customer service for Dish Network, and “hold time” was one of our metrics we were judged on. The workaround to avoiding high hold times was to just “mute” the customer. I’m sure this happens everywhere.

Your comment made my day. I’m the one that recorded this and sent it to Jez. I followed him around for three days, went to eight town halls, and I feel like I need a week to get the slime off of my soul. He’s convinced there we’re part of some conspiracy in his district that shouldn’t be taken seriously, so I love…

While this is awesome, these kind of stories give me pause as to the state of my home and the impression it would give to FBI raiders. Like was I really too tired to throw my clothes in the hamper last night? Would the FBI guys sit around the office post pre-dawn raid and muse “hey did you see tornado’s underpanties…

Get out of here with that rationality and let me call my cousin-in-law a fuckboy in peace.

For a second, I thought you mean that Jon Goodman was dead. I was so confused.

Go for Detroit or Atomic Blonde I would say, I am the type of guys that likes what people call shitty movies stuff like transformers and what not (don’t hate me), even I thought this was not worth the trip to the Theatre.

I FUCKING HATE BEING A DOLPHINS FAN

never forget

Opinion: everyone should have to survive off of service industry jobs and wages for a year. It would make society a nicer place.

November 2016 was a disappointing month for many reasons. Chief among them was the electoral college decision in favor of TrumPutin.

The communication between all these fuckwits illustrates two things:

Are tiger-selfies really a Tindr thing?? How bizarre. On OKCupid, we pose exclusively with dolphins.

Jordan would have let it slide to make sure the team covered.

It taught me a lesson in pacifism. Don’t hit me—I’ll hit me.

Hey Arnold is the GOAT Nicktoon after Doug was ruined by Disney. The only potential saving grace of this reboot movie is if they can resolve the answer of what happened to Arnold’s parents without fucking that up. Given that all of the voices will obviously be different, I doubt it. The only thing giving me hope is…

My soul is fucked anyways, so I’ll say it: He needs to succumb to his brain cancer already instead of wasting my tax dollars fighting a losing battle then taking health care away from others

When he’s impeached and resigns I’ll stop. Fair?

I have no kind words for John McCain. I do not wish him a speedy recovery, I do not wish him extended lifetime. The spineless, self described “maverick” rolled over for a fucking moron who consistently insulted him and his service (and by proxy the rest of the servicemen and women).