I googled “Cougar Asphyxiation” and it took me here.  Not what I was looking for unfortunately.

• If you have small children with you, protect them by picking them up so they won’t panic and run.

I once had a cougar bite my dick but she apologized afterwards. Nevertheless, I backed slowly away.

I think I found his wallet:

Just give up on the old brand and re-brand as Lil Jon’s Pizza:

It’s not intelligence. Let’s lay that argument to rest. It’s perspective.

“We wanted all of our kids to grow up learning that fairness, justice, equality, and truth were important virtues. Now they all believe that shit and we have no idea where they’re getting it from!”

Oh wow!  “Fairness”! How Awful!  The next thing the FOX network will be complaining about is how some people  have been brought up to expect “Liberty” and “Justice For All”.

I think what annoys me more is they (like my parents and millions of other Americans) can only be convinced to vote based on their taxes and nothing else important. 

Im also curious what is so fucking horrible about fairness?

Yeah, I love it when the older generation criticizes the younger one as if they had nothing to do with it. These kids aren’t giving themselves participation trophies....

“There’s class warfare, all right, but it’s my class, the rich class, that’s making war, and we’re winning.”

You poors just don’t understand. After a time you have to buy your yacht a yacht companion of its own, or else your yacht will be lonely. 

I think what’s being missed is, it’s people that are shitting up the parks. In many cases, literally.

Yea what I read here isn’t a government shutdown problem, its an asshole problem.

I don’t think it’s sanctimonious to suggest not leaving your shit (literal and figurative) off the side of a trail in the country’s greatest natural areas. Yes, it would be less of an issue if the park could be adequately staffed to open more facilities. Still, it’s amazing how many people hear, “free admission,” go,…

A subaru? Funny, you don’t come off as a lesbian.

I hate to be that crunchy sanctimonious asshole but, holy shit, have these assholes ever hear of leave no trace?

Are people going precisely because it’s closed down and basically lawless right now? I don’t understand why it’s so much more busy than it would normally be this time of year. I can’t imagine thinking “I read it’s full of garbage and shit right now; I’ve gotta go check this out!”

People have worse hobbies or habits than video games. You play them because you have fun. If you find something that’s more enjoyable, do that, but don’t regret having fun. The only downside to me about playing video games is that it’s a completely inside activity, you do want to balance it with something you enjoy…