This should be higher up. If more billionaires were like Bill we’d all be better off.

It’s pretty good as far as McDonald’s dipping sauces go.

I hand made pie crust once. I spent all day making it and creating a pie filling out of dried fruits and nuts. It smelled and looked delicious. I set it on the counter to cool and our dog, who never before or since had done so, got on the counter and ate it. I through the mostly eaten pie away in a fit of rage and…

My kids know the heel is the best because we’re civilized folks.

Considering making my very first impulse buy...

True story: the first slice of pizza I had in NYC was at a Sbarro. We were tired with two hangry children and really all we wanted was a place to sit down and a place with a bathroom and of all the places like that it was the closest.

Nothing wrong with enjoying their music but it is a bit pretentious.

What about the music of Nirvana makes it bad? 

Is a used tissue really grosser than a fork or some chicken bone someone slobbered all over?

I was with you until you brought Nirvana into it.

My small children would also find this hilarious.

I have people that take care of this kind of thing for me.

The plastic bags really add to the mouthfeel.

No restaurant want this.  

Oh man ... that’s an original one.

You can oretty much reference these two before every Salty article going forward.

Impossibolognese!

Dear Sarah,

I feel like this is the reason they made this car.

Starbucks normal cold brew is trash. I could see drinking that and coming to Claire’s conclusion.