“But they are America’s sweethearts...”

I’ve gotten a sudden, totally-unrelated-to-this-article inspiration about my new clothing line. It will feature t-shirts of various Kardashians, super-imposed with a picture of me squatting and peeing on them. I’m sure they would agree that is totally fair use of their likenesses.

And it’s like hello, your initials are KK. I mean...it’s just too close for comfort. And out in the wild where people may not know where that shirt is from? No no. It’s all bad.

Okay buddy.

THEY WERE GIVEN PLASTIC SURGERY WHILE UNDERAGE INSTEAD OF A UNIVERSITY EDUCATION. That was their investment to gain business acumen.

My favorite part is how Sharon Osbourne can’t even be bothered to see the difference between Kendall and Kylie. They are miles beneath her and they’re just blurry dark haired peasants to her.

...and then eventually one of them will run for President.

I am not surprised they didn’t know better, but I am surprised there wasn’t one person involved in this whole process who didn’t understand this very basic issue.

Maybe I’m giving them too much credit, but I am astonished that they thought they could appropriate Pac’s and Biggie’s images without consulting with their respective estates.

I’ll give you a hint about her motivations...

Anne Hathaway will starve herself in the part of Julia in her bid for a Tony.

But she wasn’t entertaining to watch. I can understand watching complex characters; seeing them evolve or watching them slowly destroy themselves. Don Draper was no angel. Neither was Dexter. Or Walter White.

Plus, I found the whole secondary storyline about Sophia’s hernia off-putting.

THANK YOU! She was so unlikeable. When she straight up just took that rug from in front of that store and ignored the salesperson telling her to stop. It wasn’t funny. It wasn’t badass. It wasn’t cool. Her character was a huge asshole.

Apparently Bob Saget is worth over 100 million dollars....

It is kind of impressive to get Netflix $$ and the cast they did and STILL make a really awful show.

At some point in the first few episodes (the show made me rage-y and I quit), she behaves so unnecessarily terrible at her job that she gets fired, refuses her dad’s money because reasons, then GOES INTO A DUMPSTER TO FIND FOOD. I want to find the people who think that is funny and/or relatable, and punch them.

She doesn’t understand that the main character isn’t likable.

It was a good show