The fact that there's probably 3-4 petitions started by Jalops every year.

Are... Are you new here, or just trolling?

Once you see it, you can’t unsee it.

Get the garage, and ride your fixie to it from your house.

(I’m assuming you have a fixie, because you live in the Capitol Hill neighborhood of Seattle).

I read all the way to the end, expecting it to be another one of Torch’s “I spoke with ____.” spoof articles, full of silly torch drawings and such.

I want to get that, and do that at literally every intersection.

This needs more stars.

I hope you all choke on have an allergic reaction to your airplane peanuts.

I declare this COTCOTD.

Yes, except for commercial vehicles (semi trucks and buses)... Unless you buy one, in which case it’s a personal vehicle.

Meanwhile, in Pennsylvania.

What you did there. I see it.

(Note that these are not tips for how to prepare your car for the snow. There will be no advice on, like, how to put snow tires or chains on your car, or what to look for in a four-wheel-drive vehicle. These are tips for people who have somewhere to go, like home, and have only the car they’ve already got, with the…

Biggest for me: free international texting. Just save them under contacts with the full phone number (including international prefix). I can send full multi-media messages to friends in Germany, at no additional cost (and, this is the first I’ve ever heard of the $0.99 thing. Always been free for me!).

It’s quite simple, really. They didn’t create the telecommunications system we have here on earth.

The car is nice, too!

“Still a Tiguan.”

Hate all you want, the Focus in that video is a manual wagon.

Actually fairly common in Europe. Roads are narrow, if you parked fully in the street you’d block traffic. You see signs like these all over the place:

The FR-S is much the same. There’s a “maps” button on my stereo that brings up the same statement. I could go to my nearest Toyota/Scion dealer and have them install an SD card for a ridiculous sum of money, but I’d rather just use my phone instead (or, you know, just know where I’m going).