Guys wanting to try shit because they see it in porn is one thing. Them demanding it over the initial objections of partners suggests the issue isn’t porn, but a character defect. Partners giving in to such desires despite not wanting to is a sign they are too immature to be having sex.

I think child molestation/ child rape should be capital crimes. I support death by Craftsman tool box.

I’ve actually been bumping Barbra’s catalogue lately. Thinking about walking down the aisle to “Evergreen”. Charles had great taste, once.

To be honest - I consider all of the publications mentioned (that I am familiar with) to be a cross between tabloids and opinion blogs.

So the film looks shitty and is a rehash of old trope. Just get rid of men & get rid of that nasty aggression in society...yeah...nope!

All I saw was red at your initial response. I specifically stated I had experienced a violation that I did not consider a rape in addition to a rape- you started your post with talking about my “rapes”and my “rapists”. It seemed to me that you were suggesting I didn’t know what had happened to me.

You know what really bothers me about this film and the casting? Given what Zoe Saldana looks like, what conventional beauty standards are, and what Simone really looked like- this is Hollywood uglying up what they consider a pretty actress to play a serious role! Like Charlize in Monster.

Don’t rewrite my history, ever. I have been raped - it was clear it was unwanted & I was a child. The other incident I referred to was not clear. I didn’t say what you said, I didn’t move how you did. I was drunk & so was he. I do not hold him responsible for what I didn’t communicate.

Thank you. I am not trying to suggest this kid is a squeaky clean good guy. I think he is an ass who was dishonest about only wanting to make out at the very least. But I also think rape and consent are such muddled concepts to a lot of adults that I can’t assume he KNEW what he was doing in some nefarious way.

My point is - “it hurts” isn’t a clear no or stop to everyone. I have an opinion and so do you. That isn’t what I would say to get someone to stop fucking me. Both parties were close in age. I don’t assume the boy was much more experienced than the girl. Sometimes sex does hurt- size, angle, insufficient lube - it…

Just remember that in this case - we are talking about teens. The dude in question is not an adult or likely some experienced predator. People seem okay with referring to her as a child - if she is - then he is. Generally speaking children see everything that isn’t a clear no as a maybe yes at best.

So not even close.

Seriously, I am just for removing any ambiguity from the situation. Every time I see an article like this commenters assume the alleged rapist HAD to know. How?

You can cut the snark. I am 41 and don’t know anyone who routinely either asks permission or gives an enthusiastic yes. That is reality- I’ve dated in the last decade & while some shit had changed - that had not. So I tend to state things based on how they are, not how some feel they should be.

My best friend had twins - the child care costs in our county would have likely exceeded her take home pay. That isn’t even counting work costs like transportation & keeping up a work wardrobe.

I get it. What exactly am I supposed to be ringing my hands over? And why, oh why, do any of you think entertainers are supposed to be better people than Joe Schmoe in a flyover state?

While Abby sounds like a dunce w/ her confused answer - this was a fucked up situation.

Well, to be honest- a lot of the black community has difficulty with acknowledging dv as abuse. My mama raised me that no man “should” put hands on a woman, but also put the onus on me to not provoke them. There was a lot of dv in my family and in a fair # of black families that I’ve known. We don’t talk about it or…

Sorry, my comment was messy & not totally directed at you. My point was basically - people really don’t get side eye for working with rapists or abusers. The consuming public in general is inconsistent with what upsets it. Pee Wee Herman was untouchable for years for wacking off to adult porn & looking skeevy. He…

1) Not “everyone” has followed the Ke$ha story. For months & months I heard Ke$ha & tuned out. I am not the only one. It was only recently that I learned what was going on. She wasn’t on my radar & what was a civil lawsuit didn’t interest me. Criminal suits catch my attention- not civil ones.