Erm, that’s the joke. But apparently not a very good one *sigh*

So ... why does she have 4 phones?

Imagine how much faster it would have gone if they have mad skillz like this guy.

Two of my favorite authors co-wrote one of my all time favorite books, and it’s one of the few books I owned in hardcover. Please, please don’t fuck it up.

Don’t touch the screen if there’s an insect crawling inside.

Plot twist: NSA is the one sending out the spam as some kind of mass surveillance tool.

“Trust us, we’re the government.”

For one thing, they might have caught some disease, especially after the horrible conditions, and you don’t want to spread that to wild populations. Edit: never mind, I see someone explained it much better than me. Sorry.

If yours has gotten so bad as to create whatever that is above

Have you ever wished that your phone has a much bigger screen sometimes but can still fit comfortably in your pocket?

I’m not into that, but hey, whatever rocks your boat. I’m not judging.

It’s not even clear why she was there in the first place.

On the flip side, it happened before, multiple times (W was re-elected, FFS) and by all indications it will continue happening.

In a just world, your comment would have a lot more stars.

This house!

He’s not after Black votes (or hearts). He’s trying to convince the Whites who voted for him that he’s reasonable, the Democrats are evil, and they should continue voting for him.

got out of its pen in January due to an apparent electrical failure

Personally I’m more intrigued by the idea of William Gibson in The Peripheral that the Great Pacific Garbage Patch eventually becomes a micronation that harvests the plastics.

Mountain lion, lion, close enough?

Like everyone else, it’s just announcing its intent to run in 2020.