Why is he wearing his Laker Uniform to an Elite Eight Game?

The author of the Vice article just seems very immature: Numerous relationship partners did not meet your requirements, but you continued the relationship every time? She has vowed to never give another person oral forever. Forever is a long time, girl.

In fairness to Lemon, when they told him he was going to interview a Grand Wizard, he thought they meant John Wall.

So you're saying "man fixes his car with one weird trick! dealerships hate him"?

I'm surprised she knows what a pass is considering she's been married to Kobe Bryant for all these years.

Russell Wilson heard that he had the opportunity to dance onstage with Flo Rida, but he decided to pass.

I mean really, how hard is it to believe that a 9/11 denier could out think himself?

I thought I was tripping bowls when the dancing trees came out. I approve of anything that makes me feel like I'm high when I'm not actually high.

Welker: [becomes concerned that the Seahawks will, in turn, target him after his multiple concussions]

That might actually be worse.

I love it so much when y'all so desperately want something to be racist and then it just isn't.