(Powerade's are ribbed.)

I tuned out when the methwolves showed up. Love the first few seasons, bored and annoyed by the rest alas.

For some reason out of the corner of my eye the headline looked like, "Missing 74-year old woman fed mothman granola bars in the woods."

Rainbow Road is in Mortal Kombat 8?

Sseriously. I was hoping for an intense and difficult Rainbow Road. I am disappoint. The updated N64 Rainbow Road feels way too short and boring as well.

That's all well and good, but does it make Rainbow Road in MK8 any less boring?

whenever possible, slap the other person's controller out of their hand. especially if they're prepping a blue turtle shell.

How to end friendships:

Here's a GIF so we can watch that save over and over again. AMAZING!

Man. Lebron on the Thunder would constitute an absolutely devastating frontcou- THAT GUY EATS HIS OWN CUM!!1122/!?>??

Why? No one has fucked Tebow 1.0 yet.

"Wrong kid." - Donald Sterling

And you know what? Chipotle's food isn't even that good. Chipotle has skated by for years on the fact that it isn't Taco Bell. But compared to your local Mexican restaurant, Chipotle is garbage. The burrito insides are lukewarm. There's always one bite that's all sour cream. Half the shit is rice if you get…

People don't go to Chipotle because they want Mexican food. People go to Chipotle because they want Chipotle.

Have you ever had actual Mexican food? It's better and cheaper and likely lower-calorie (it would be hard not to be).

"I remember my first beer."

Chipotle isn't that good? Have you EVER gotten a burrito bowl with a to-go lid and shaken that shit all up to mix the goodness together and then dipped away with chips?? Heaven.

"Chipotle's food isn't even that good."

Oh my god! Wes Welker's dog is SO cute!!