[picks up phone; cancels all Monday guests]—

In case anyone else was curious:

It is My Father’s will that your entire life should be centered on Me.

Seems like Jesus has an inferiority complex.

Our children were created for friendship with Christ. Before anything else, this is their chief purpose in life: to be Christ’s friend.

My son’s on the autism spectrum. He’ll be turning 8 next month, and we’re not doing a party because I’m afraid this exact thing will happen to him. (We’re taking him to an amusement park instead)

For fucks sake. When I was young, even if I didn’t want to go to a classmates party, my parents dragged me there anyways. Some days aren’t about you. Plus, you get cake. Go to the party!

Why would you let your child be this cruel and turn down this poor child’s party? WHY ARE PEOPLE BAGS OF DICKS!?

(I still have no idea who Britt McHenry is, and I’ve looked into it.)

Who would ever give a tow company a good review?

Gotta say, I feel pretty safe in this judgement.

Lawrence Phillips is a detestable human being, but Tom Osborne covered more crimes than Jerry Orbach. http://www.si.com/vault/1995/09/…

Though obviously far, far less serious than his actual crimes, Phillips also missed the block on Aeneas Williams that caused the end of Steve Young’s career:

[Kevin Eubanks laugh]

Your repeated requests that I not read into this are causing me to read into this.

Nailed it.

Yeah, at 33 Jesus spent a lot of time just hanging out too.

Good call, I updated the post.

LALALA CAN’T HEAR YOU.

“Got away with it for so long? This isn’t long at all, with the drinks and the long pants and the football and the pudding pops.....”