Volkswagen Beetle.

It's time...

Threatening to kill anyone these days isn't smart or funny.

We're about to fly through another plane's contrail

From the crash stats I've seen, this type of crash is less than 1% of all crashes, not significant at all. The Camry gets 5 starts from NHTSA and that's good enough for me.

Since my current ride is 11 years old, I doubt I'd be disappointed receiving anything new (Well, except, maybe, a Versa sedan). However, I would be most grateful receiving a RWD sedan. Maybe a Hyundai Genesis or Dodge Charger.

Props for the lol-inducing headline.

Fat C and D-pillars. They create blind spots and just look wrong.

If my office was a quarter-mile away...

2002 Chrysler Sebring (aka 2001 Dodge Stratus for testing purposes)

People attend the wiener dog races just for the crashes.

The Dodge Dart.

Eye roll indeed.

John Force should do a burnout in the Lincoln Tunnel.

I miss my '75. The Bosch fuel injection was great, even at -30C.

1982 Honda Civic 1500GL because I miss consuming gas at a rate of 5L/100km.

One of my faves: the tour bus chase.

I stay awake and watch the entire event. Pass the Red Bull.

Don 'the Snake' Prudhomme's Plymouth Arrow Funny Car. Simple but effective.

Bruce Allen and Kenny Koretsky crash at Texas.