Does that make sense in English?

Well, gee when he starts off saying ''Straight white guy...'' kinda implies he identifies as a straight white guy.

You should do your part and kill yourself if that's how you really feel about it.

Most kids I know say I am the best kisser.

I am duly chastened by the fury of your moral opprobrium.

Believe me, in general I love most kids. I come from a huge family and love the little monsters. When I moved and left one gig, my favorite little buddy who always ate with her my parents at my bar made me a going away card and I cried my fucking eyes out.

I love all this internet second guessing.

In a perfect world I would have the empathy to care enough about that and try and have a heartfelt teachable moment with the snot nosed bastards in question. In real life, it's something I have a surreptitious shot and a laugh over with the other bartender who saw the whole thing and thought it was funny.

It would be investigated on the basic of the physical evidence and the most provable stuff first, then opportunity and then motive. The cops would hopefully dig up as much dirt and motive as possible to give the prosecutors.

You should definitely try it. If you wear an apron, no one will notice your hard on.

If you have one of these dolls, for fuck's sake, do not leave it in a baby seat in your car. People will call the cops thinking it's real.

I worked at a place that always kept plates in a salamander - an open faced toaster oven type device. This was to keep the food from cooling down too much on a cold plate on the way to the table and we were meant to always use hot pads when carrying and warn the customers of the temp of the plates. But coworkers…

I am a guy and I don't know what you're talking about. Picture of hot bad boy turns on middle class ladies. How is that duplicitous or hypocritical?

You are a brave crusader for righteousness.

Good use of caps. Very convincing.

If I took your ridiculous proposition seriously and felt like arguing with you, I would. Asserting that you have done something you haven't doesn't make it so. You're chasing your own tail and calling yourself smart for it.

Because there is the possibility that the judge could be as ugly as your mother and that would constitute cruel and unusual punishment.

It's ok, just go back there and apologize for what occurred and tell the server that it really bothered you. They will know you are sincere. You definitely can go back. I have worked in restaurants my whole life and we know that you aren't always responsible for your dining partners.

You can get surgery for that now. They do it a lot in Korea.

I am too lazy to dislike anyone that long.