The Wolverine 2 ½: The Secret of the Ooze

And here’s the other dress she wore. Fuck. It’s gorgeous, too.

I imagine Weapon X program or the Professor would have had his glands removed years ago, or they’d have made him sleep in the garage.

Thor the Dark World is inoffensive. It’s disappointing for wasting Christopher Eccleston, but it’s hard to hate it.

Age of Ultron had a lot of problems, but James Spader, Paul Bettany’s Vision, Klaw cameo, Bruce Banner and Tony Stark science-bro’ing it up, and the Hulkbuster fight was enough to tip it into the “liked it” column for me.

I personally liked Thor 2 in the virtues of:

Marvel Studios succeeds, in part, because ‘superhero’ is the only type of movie they make. They specialize. They don’t have executives who are only interested in making dramas, or thrillers, or action movies but have to put up with making stupid comic book shit.

I liked Iron Man 2...

“the chief of security for a global corporation”

They had me at “I’m the best there is at what I do, but mostly what I do is gather nuts for winter.”

I now have an image of G W Bailey facing off against Carey ‘Wolverine’ Mahoney in ‘X- Academy’. Imagine the hijinks as Wolverine hires a hooker to give Professor ‘X’ Lassard a surprise during a lecture!

OR! Wolverine has the offbrand SNIKT sound effect!

Or Benverine.

I love the off-brand-sounding SNUKT sound effect.

There was and it was Georgie-boy. The only requirements for creating Star Wars canon was that; George had to approve it, and it couldn’t undermine anything he created.

This already sounds infinitely more interesting than the prospect of a third Wolverine film

I look forward to either watching an unintentionally hilarious unfinished version or watching the DVD a year or two after release when I remember “Oh yeah, there’s been a couple X-Men movies that have come out and a new one comes out next year. I should get on that.”

In my head, this version of Howard the Duck sounds like Master Billy Quizboy from Venture Brothers.

Wolverine III: Night Of The Mustelid.