WHY IS A NON-DEMOCRAT ON A DEMOCRATIC PARTY UNITY TOUR?

Please be Thai rent boy. Please be Thai rent boy. Please be Thai rent boy.

Ken Griffey, Jr. juiced? Say what now?

He’s a fucking joke who’s also a woman-hating religious fanatic, one erratic and clogged heartbeat from being POTUS.

On the plus side, Munn can wear high heels again.

Wow. It’s “nice” to see that even right-wing, xenophobic, racist, vile women can receive the same half-assed sexist shit as other women.

Oh Sweet Jesus YES! I’ve lusted after this gun since 1982, but I’m poor! LOL

Who cares about nuclear war? Bear Bryant is still alive!!!

When did Tori Spelling’s face become so . . . angular and large?

Good for Kristaps! Only makes me like him more.

Sigh. Time for the Puffs Plus.

World’s Worst Columnist.

There, there, Hot Woman. There HAS to be at least one other average-looking finance bro’ in NYC. Don’t give up the dream!

I’d probably vote “Not Guilty” for Aaron Hernandez, too. I mean, the guy’s killed three people already, and tried to kill a fourth who witnessed two of the murders. I don’t see him hesitating to have a juror or two whacked.

You’re a heartless, awful person.

I never knew until recently that the bull statue was some sort of guerilla art. I just assumed (I know) that some asshole Wall Street firm commissioned it. It certainly seems to me to valorize Capitalism, not criticize it.

Sometimes I’ll read an article that was published prior to November of last year. It’s like looking at another world.

JHFC. I didn’t know that over half of mass shootings were connected to DA. We’re so awful.

I’ve been to Philadelphia twice for conferences. It’s a shit hole.

Browns’ 1st-round draft picks — the only thing that can make a Bears fan the tiniest bit less miserable about their #1 picks.