Because the AL doesn’t need much motivation to beat a league that is clearly not as good as them? I guess I should have said AL teams with a chance at the WS must be pissed.

I see. They obviously did the right thing. There is no point to winning 35-40 games. The goal is championships, not the chance at an 8 seed. Trust the Process!

Randy Newman is a great songwriter! Let’s Drop the Big One epitomizes ‘Merica perfectly.

I don’t know why I like Sixers and Philly fans jokes so much, I’m a die-hard fan and have been since I was a little kid. Maybe it just helps me deal with the pain? Either way, the Sixers will be good in two years because Hinkie died for our sins.

Embiid is the man and him wanting to be called “The Process” is perfect. I trust you, JoJo “The Process” Embiid, it’s your foot I don’t trust.

Why do these jokes always end with power forward when we draft centers? The problem is that they can’t play the 4 defensively. Embiid, Jahlil, Nerlens are all 5s. Sure Simmons and Saric are 4s, but I have very little doubt Simmons would be able to guard most 3s. Either say center or say bigs, these jokes are wrong.

I thought Robinson got hurt and that’s how they got him?

The AL has to be pissed about this as they win every All-Star game. Also, cash bonuses are a much better motivator, especially considering most teams (read players) have no fantasies about making it to the World Series. How was that not obvious in the first place? (I’m sure it was, but why would the league want to pay…

“The best medicine is the emptiness of everything.”

Idk, I always took Country Mac’s Ocular Patdown for a Dalessandro’s kind of guy.

Anyone else visualizing the comical notion of his head cartoonishly spinning around that many times only to spin in the opposite direction the same amount, leaving him dizzy to the point of thinking the assailant was actually his wife, so he goes in for a kiss and the situation repeats itself unto eternity? No? Just…

+1 for mentioning we all pay for poor people’s hospital visits no matter what

I loved your opener. Every deadspin comment should start with that.

Not surprising at all. It’s smart basketball to let someone grab a board who can run with the ball in transition. Not uncommon for a bigger man to let the smaller guy get the rebound when the only contest is between teammates.

When I recommend comments, the number of stars goes down. What the hell is going on? I can send a comment from 100 to 0 stars. I assume that I am the only one who sees this mistake and it is not real. If not, I have been given too much power and need to be stopped.

Eh, not if you say historic with a basically silent h. But if you’re suggesting that is a waterboardable offense, I could endorse torture.

I assumed I didn’t need to say since WW2 because that was so obvious. I assumed too much.

His VP wants the government to pay for gay conversion therapy.

Counterpoint: Those who fought for our independence did so in the 18th century. People aren’t trying to take our freedom. We are imposing our will upon them for political and economic gain and we need to stop perpetuating the lie that our soldiers are fighting for freedom and democracy and our rights blah blah…

Guys, if the Eagles win, I win my office pool for the week. Seriously, guys, I need this. I have nothing.