Me too.

Damn, you made me cry. When she went, so did Gene’s sense of humor.

Can I come into the out now? Please let me out of the greys , thanks!

Cleaning time between prep tasks, I think. Or maybe it was broken. Or lost. Anyway, Eastern European Fred Flintstone was enough of an asshole to hide it just because (see “firing employee illegally over workplace injury.”)

This would be hilarious, because it’s the kind of weird pickiness my kids pull. “Upside down” = “squares not triangles” and “a chip touched it.”

This. WTH. When my kids turn into Taz, the last place I want to be is anywhere in public, let alone somewhere that will make them more so.

Slicers only have guards if your boss is not a massive asshole who hides the guard. Just FYI.

What is it with managers/owners and valuing the lettuce over the employee? I got fired over slicing off the end of my left ring finger while shredding goddamn iceberg lettuce. Ostensibly for “wasting food, ruining towels and costing us money for sending you to the ER.”

Is this where I beg to be ungreyed? Do I need to make goat sacrifices, or bring offerings of gifs?

Fuck yes! Also:

I called over the chef and I told him to take it away and bring it back hot. He did!
The looks on their faces still haunt me today!!
(Crying) I thought they were laughing at the chef, when all the time,
they were laughing at me as I ate my piping hot gazpacho soup! I never
ate at the Captain’s Table again. That was…

One of the few memories of my food service days that have not either been actively blocked or dulled with the merciful passage of time is standing cheerfully behind the counter at the snobby coffeebar/bistro in the Golf Resort Town and silently begging Expensively Coiffed and Dressed Lady #453 to please, please, ohgodp…

Also, there obviously needs to be training classes for being a human being, like there are parenting classes or refresher driving courses.

Victoria’s cute story about her aunt was like a little palate cleanser in the midst of a buffet of various kinds of depression about the future of humanity.

I make stuff with yarn, but I don’t make amigurumi.

I had an ex like that. He went briefly vegetarian. His idea was to only eat faux meat stuff and fried things. He very nearly did do himself in. I laughed.

*Makes elaborate yuckky face of infinite disgust.*

I had a feeling that this post would bring out more cockroaches than even the kids-in-restaurants post. Looks like I was right. *eats popcorn*

This sounds like it was the wankiest of wanky self-congratulatory look-at-me events. Like a perfect storm of smug self absorption using one famous person to pat another famous person on the back in the name of people who were not there and wouldn’t have been invited anyway.