An ES like that would be the most disappointing Christmas gift ever.

This shit, every year;

Easy question. All of them.

Remember when Lamborghinis had rear-wheel drive and gated manuals? Pepperidge Farm remembers.

This bad boy. A girl I knew in college needed me to help her with something on her car(so long ago I don’t even know what I did, this was around the early 2000s) but my reward was this... thing. At the time, I had a 97 Mitsu Galant that I entered in shows:

Say what you want. Go drive one and then tell me you don’t like it. LS1, RWD, and a 6-speed is great fun in almost anything. I don’t get too excited about the looks of the factory ones, but that’s not what the car is about to me.

To be fair, I remember you losing your shit when some rude and uninformed commenter said that SAABs were crap and truly deserved to die.

The fact that this with a turbo 4/V6 is not the regular Impala/Caprice is the cancer that is eating away at our society!

Who the fuck would actually think this is a good idea. This is essentially predatory advertising. Some poor idiot is going to see this and think this is a better idea than the 2010 S-Class he was looking at. Anyone with enough money to afford both the car and the maintenance probably has enough sense to not purchase…

Funny - I see a beautiful car defiled. By beauty, I’m referring to the citroen.

Though you never saw her on camera, Nicole’s fingerprints were all over almost every video we made. Heard Doug’s mom call from his basement? That was Nicole’s dulcet tones. Saw a pair of legs flying in the air when we lost the key to the Ariel Atom? That was Nicole, making sure we didn’t have to trudge back on our own…

If you’ve watched a Jalopnik video this year and enjoyed what you saw, thank Nicole. She and the rest of our (relatively tiny!) video team busted ass all year to take Jalopnik video from scratch to something amazing.

These three, all for sale at the same dealership, totalling far beneath your budget.

The judges would also accept “hearse.”

I feel like an old limo would lead to a ton of shenanigans! Who doesn’t like shenanigans?

Citroen 2CV

How about a Trabant?