There is no such thing as “the original white people,” because there is no such thing as a “white person.” There have been too many waves of migration, too many tribes riding in off the steppes and over the Carpathians.

Must have been too young for the Ballard years, huh?

Not even vintage Moon. 58-year-old modern Moon.

I acknowledge that white people are terrible. However, in my experience, so is every other color of people.

Maybe don’t read an article about where Ant-Man is at the end of his movie?

It’s an article about where the characters are after the movies. Spoilers are inherent to the subject matter.

Thanks.

Cena’s run this year has been kinda mind-boggling to me. He was so universally hated because of his current Saturday morning cartoon persona, but he’s now doing something that almost no other legend in recent memory has ever done: he’s putting over the next generation guys on an almost weekly basis.

Before we get to mine, I think a mid-year awards column wouldn’t be complete without...a THIRD COLUMNIST.

Is Alpha Flight too much to ask for? Northstar? Puck? Sasquatch?

“the first time in his life he received affirmative consent was right before fucking them in the ass.”

“There are more Steelers fans than Titans fans in this city.” I’m hoping the Yinzer’s responses to this line comprise a good chunk of the Steelers Why Your Team Sucks post.

Dude, we fucking go to the mat over minor differences in superhero costumes over there. Something this provocative will probably cause a fire at Gawker’s server-farm.

Albert, I have said some really nice things about you and your writing in the past. I now recant those things, and repent of all my sins against the Deadspin commentariat. I renounce Burneko, and all his works.

In isolation, The Dark Knight Returns is a fantastic Elseworld-ish tale with some fun low-impact satire. When read in the context of his later work you can see his grip on reality began to slip. It gets really disturbing once you start connecting the dots with things like Holy Terror and All-Star Batman and Robin.

Of all the people I expected to take this troll bait, Jolie Kerr was not very close to the top of the list.

I TOO COMMEND ME

“Darth Zimmerman” - brilliant.

Went to see it today. There was some silliness and humor, especially with his ability to command ants (although they did give a scientific explanation; he’s not just king of the ants), but not as much as Guardians of the Galaxy.

This is a good review. Brevity is the soul of everything but Leitch. B+