All I could think was maybe a doctor originally lived in this house and saw all their patients there? It’s a stretch but it’s all I can come up with that isn’t completely bonkers.

You are not alone- it’s gross to me too. Like listening to someone smack mashed potatoes around their open mouth. Only it’s two people sharing a mouthful of potatoes. Blech.

This piece nailed my feelings exactly: Fischer seems to be glomming onto the show with a peaked-in-high-school vibe emanating from her always and it kind of makes me sad. Though there is the possibility that she is only hanging onto this show not out of some starry-eyed emo nostalgia for life when she was part of TV’s…

You got your star before I had even finished the first sentence. Then I read the rest and I regret that I have only one star to give.

I am also nursing a 7-week old as I read Dirt Bag and dang it, I haven’t received one single shiny green pleather nursing trench so far! I do have a wind machine blowing straight on us though, so that’s something.

I get this. The “helpful” thing that you would just rather not have help on. My brother will volunteer to wash the dishes but he refuses to use the dishwasher (because why? No idea.) and he doesn’t dry them. So the ENTIRE kitchen counter is taken up by wet dishes and then there are giant puddles of water left behind…

Mine this year is also shaping up to be disastrous! Time (again) to address my mother’s drinking- it’s been 2 years since a surgeon told her that her liver was in bad shape and she’s only gotten worse. And this year there is a newborn (mine-yay!) that she wants to hold all the time. Not when you’re drunk lady! This…

Perhaps Adam Sandler's career has been embiggened by his noble spirit.

I first heard Adam Sandler on a comedy CD when I was 11 or 12. My friend Amanda brought it over and told me it was SO funny and everyone thought this guy was hilarious, he was the newest cool thing. (His SNL days I believe?) Then she played the CD and I heard a grown man singing idiotic songs in the voice of a 2 year…

I have taken many yoga classes over the years, with many people, in many cities, and found that some woman teachers adjust often (which I liked, especially as a new student) but that ALL the male teachers adjusted often. I’ve had 15? 20? male teachers over the 15 years I’ve been doing this. And they almost all have…

He looks like the kind of guy who already thinks he is hot shit and due to my contrary nature I would want to be sure that he knows that I do not think he is hot shit. (Whether or not I actually want to bang him is irrelevant.)

I want to add that my actual, real 3-week old baby will occasionally seem to my sleep-deprived eyes like an animatronic doll with his jerky motions and random squeaks. I love that goofy little doll.

Curate, yes! You are absolutely right. Adding it to the list.

I can’t stand “journey,” it makes my eyes roll so hard. It always has; even before I had 8 years of infertiliy and had that word shoved at me ten thousand times. Someone  even suggested we name our child Journey (horrified shudder.)

Good God, addiction is a bitch. A frustrating, head banging against the wall, want to ring someone’s neck bitch. I am not in it, just adjacent to it (both parents) but I go through my own cycle of anger> frustration>sadness>acceptance>empathy.

Sure why not logging? Logs are great! They roll down stairs, alone or in pairs, and roll over your neighbors dog. They’re great for a snack, they fit on your back, it's log! Log! Log!

Des it not? I totally knew that...

I’m so curious about what the bodyguard looks like, but I dont want to Google it because then Google thinks that all I want to see is Karjenner news and Dirt Bag is as far into my life as I want to bring this news. So I take your word for it: it’s bodyguard’s bebe. Thanks for the gossip!

I only follow museums and flower farms on my Instagram (to keep it pretty but not FOMO-inducing) but I would follow geology edits of selfies in a minute. Please do this. 

I absolutely hated to watch Ross until the day I realized that. The leather pants scene still cracks me up.