Everyone always knows. New Yorkers are incredibly aware without actually appearing to be aware. It's a skill.

You know, I'm a pretty go-woth-the-flow kind of guy. Sure, I get kinda up in arms about shit on the Internet, but don't we all? In real life, I'm about as laid back as laid back gets.

A black man suggesting not being black may help you not be shot by the police? Get off your high horse. You must be a Christian white male.

The pause at the beginning is known as "Barbarians at the Gate." The pressure has reached an unbearable level. The brief walk after he drops his bag is known as "The Frankenstein." Trying to walk with clenched cheeks. The slight pause when he starts to drop trou is known as "The Mexican Standoff" when the pressure…

yup. Cops never lie and lawyers are free. Probably don't have work on those court days either. Especially if you fight the charge, you won't needlessly have your day in court delayed in hopes that you'll give up or be unable to fight it (due to wanting to keep that job that completely understands why you cannot work…

Yeah, Peyton Manning was flawless in his last Super Bowl

That beard is just fine.

This is a game for the non-gaming masses, the millions of people out there who've never sat in front of their computer desperately trying to fend off a nuke-crazed Gandhi. The sort of people who, upon catching a flashy Super Bowl ad featuring a movie star or model or whatever CG nonsense Heroes Charge released, pick…

Good to be a system quarterback when the system is football

Meanwhile, Julian Edelman, just back from a three-hour jog in the rain, has poured himself a bowl of gravel to enjoy in his empty kitchen.

Knocking down a player? You really are a sore loser.

So why is the appropriate action not educating them and deleting the damn videos? Jesus. I used to teach kids this age and they're stupid. They would have had NO idea of the potential consequences of what they were doing. Now they're looking at being branded for life. Surely there's a better way.

When you open your eyes during an attempt at meditation, you see what is truly inside of yourself. If you see a dog's asshole, then it is because you too are a dog's asshole. But if you see the emptiness in the center from which life flows, then you have achieved enlightenment. Also, you smell like a dog's asshole,…

Yes yes, racking up my Bingo card!

"Man who thinks 'feminists' are out to destroy men because he read an article about a woman not wanting to be harassed."

Bam, now to find someone trying to argue how the threats and actual terrorism are, in some way, about ethics.

Well yeah, partly. I mean you visit a website because it interests you, and a person's interests are a very good way to determine if you like them or not.

"A gift real special, so take off the top

Your argument is ridiculous. It literally amounts to "if she'd shut up like women should, she wouldn't get harassed".

Uh, nope, it started with attacks against Quinn and the whole "five guys" slut shaming fiasco.

Develop thicker skin? Really? Are you going to blame the victim? Yes, victim blaming seems to be a dirty word, but it is what you are engaging in. But the thing is, she shouldn't have to ignore it, because this sort of shit shouldn't be ignored or just passed off as "that's just how the internet rolls, bro". Because…

So they designed this special tool and installed it in a bathroom so that when they are caught and the NFL reviews security tapes they are able to say, "he was only in there for 90 seconds, couldn't have had the time" when in fact they were thinking ahead with their super fast ball deflater machine for just this…