Other alternatives:

I’m just seeing the Avalon for the first time, and feel like it deserves a “WHAT IN THE CRYSTAL METH THAT GRILLE”. Are they trying to compete with their own Lexus predator face?

Here we go again

It’s crazy dangerous to skate around in the dusk like that. You know, like around 1 pm.

Car! *grabs goal and skates off the highway

I have to tell you, you haven’t owned a real AMG until you have owned a Mitsubishi Galant AMG.

As an owner of current, and many AMGs in the past, (real AMGs, 55s, 63s and two 65s) the continued dilution of the AMG nameplate is saddening. AMG means nothing in MB’s lineup anymore. You can get a 43, and now 53 in almost every model in their lineup. These are not real AMG cars, just a marketing shtick to get people…

...why does it have side mirrors? So you can see the impending fuck-up and not be able to do anything about it?

Just ask the dolphin-shaped pool toy that served as my high school girlfriend.

dear god hell to the fuck no on that H6. so many nightmares after owning one for five years. these cars are great for about 200k miles and then they completely fall to shit and all of the parts are expensive and harder to find. if you can find a low mileage example then fine but stay away from high mileage ones.

I’m 27. Not even close.

The best hand-me-down car is no hand-me-down car. When I was 16 I scraped enough money together to buy my own first car and I learned a little bit out this experience. It’s called pride of ownership. Out of all of my high school friends, I was the only one who bought my car with my own money. All of my friends who got…

The free ones that are not:

A Grand Marquis. Once someone learns how to drive one they’ll be able to drive anything smaller than it with no issue - add on their reliability and the ease of working on them, and you’ve got a good contender IMO.

So either he got F-52 confused with B-52 or just slipped up translating the total number of planes delivered and created a new designation.

As the lobster was lowered into the pot, it wondered which was crueler: the knowledge of its impending demise, or the knowledge that, based on its answers to a BuzzFeed quizlet, it was a Hufflepuff?

...states that lobsters now must be “stunned” before they are killed.

Um, Kevin, have you considered it’s because taro shakes don’t really taste like popcorn? I LOVE Joy Yee’s (RIP the one in Evanston), and get taro often and never thought it tasted like popcorn

Several years ago I had a party of 20 people. I ask if it was separate checks. They said one check. I bring out the check. They point to one guy who wasn’t initially at the table when I first walked up. They had a big ole laugh and then said separate checks. It took me a 1/2 hour to separate the checks. So glad I…

I once had to do 50 (yes, 50) split checks on a party of idiot frat guys because their organization card was declined. They complained to me about the amount of time it to took for them to get their credit card slips.