He’s working on being a common ancestor. 

Because the people who write the laws are the same people getting rich from them.

The last paragraph says it all: private equity. These corporate vultures purposely load an acquisition with a heavy amount of debt these companies didn’t originally generate with the absolute expectation of an eventual bankruptcy—thus destroying the company, but also wiping out the debt. Just imagine if you could…

It’s not a real registry. She’s promoting a bunch of stuff on Amazon, and in exchange Amazon donated $100k to UNICEF in honor of the work she’s done with them.

I wonder what The Police song Diddy will sample for Kim’s tribute. My picks? Spirits in the Material World or Everything She Does is Magic.

Brad Pitt dated Thandie Newton. 

You’re so cute. The catchphrase is not “Baby, you’ve won Baby.” It’s “You’re a winner baby.” It’s a reworking of a line from the movie “Mahogany” starring Diana Ross.

This would actually be even more terrifying for someone who is hearing-impaired/deaf. The whole story is around someone not hearing another person :(.

Fox News released this photo of the suspect, calling him a tan suit wearing Muslim/liberal extremist who is an illegal immigrant from Kenya.

Off topic, but is anyone else not seeing any pictures when articles link to Twitter? I just get big, blank, white spaces. 

I would definitely use his number to make a bunch of prank calls and to give to weirdos who hit on me.

I had a completely garbage day and the world is on fire and the only thing that has brought me joy is David Schwimmer being in on the joke. Bless you Ross, I needed that. 

I hope Justin Timberlake isn’t in pain but I also hope he never releases a song again

Right? He's a completely average looking man with musical talent. I mean, maybe his tattoos help him get women, but if you passed him in the street or met him at the club, would he be that big a draw? Probably not. 

Why would I want to be with someone who has been with hundreds of women? I would be afraid that he wouldn’t even remember my name afterwards. If you’re going to fuck a star, make it a hard star to fuck, and make it memorable for everyone involved. Have some fucking pride in your work.

He has never done a thing for me.

Single-malt whiskey, fidget spinners, Anne Bancroft’s wardrobe from ‘The Graduate’, and Michael Winslow from ‘Police Academy’ is a bouncer who only talks in that robot voice!

Did i hear someone ask for “Anyone?”, because that’s me! And yep, i can confirm you are understanding this legal stuff correctly.*
* I’m not actually a lawyer, but i do write posts on the internet regarding legal matters.**
**Full disclosure, lawyers have replied to my posts, usually asking me not to post silly things…

I hate the idea of a Revenge Body. It’s insane. What do you even hope to gain, here?  To make the guy regret cheating on you?  And then what?  Like, I get being mad, and I’m all for exercise as therapy, but this kind of crap is not healthy or reasonable.

Know what actually makes you go into labor? Manual labor. I spend an hour on my hands and knees chipping old kitchen tiles off my floor, baby born less than 24 hours later.  Any good doula will tell you the same. Labor not progressing fast enough? Go clean your kitchen floor on your hands and knees.