my wife’s sister is uber elitist. She went to Harvard (if you forget, wait 30 seconds, she’ll remind you) so she forgot about her roots and pretends like she was part of the Harvard elite from day one. She married an absolute tool who’d never touched a girl before and has his balls mounted. He didn’t get into med…

Worst baby has to be that 3D dancing baby from the late 90s, right?

wow! Somebody read all the way through?
I hear you on the kid getting ready after the bus gets there. I’m in a rural area, one of the roads to work was a semi “back road,” which means you can see quite a ways, which means you can see the school bus a long way off; but, the mommies can’t start hugging and kissing good…

Throwing home run balls back is the dumbest “tradition” around. First, it’s Wrigley’s tradition, not yours. And second, the bleacher people at Wrigley are smart enough to throw back a batting practice ball and keep the real one!

I never got the whole “Throw it back” mentality, especially given that it’s a HR ball from your own team (The asshole was dressed in pseudo-Astros colours). Throw back a foul ball? OK but really why? The teams really don’t need more fucking baseballs.

Did you see that ball 4 that clipped the zone graphic cam during the live pitch (late/extra innings), which would have been strike 3, but then when Fox replayed the pitch while Buck & Smoltz were discussing it, you can visibly see the “box” move to the right so that the pitch appeared to be a ball instead?

Dudes hat and douchbag sunglasses would be following.

I think Albert’s new nickname is Zesty Delight. Gonna do my best to get everyone on board.

How in the civilized world is “bless you” on par with “excuse me” and “thanks”?

What is it about saying “bless you” after sneezing makes it a nicety? Is the sneezer damned to hell forever if nobody says it? All it does is tell other people around you how ‘polite’ you are for identifying the sneezer. What exactly is so courteous about it?

As someone who has year-round allergies and sneezes 8-10 times every time something triggers a sneeze I say leave me the fuck alone and stop saying bless you to me every damn time. I’m sneezing. I get it. I don’t need bless yous or acknowledgements because I’m going to sneeze again in an hour and I don’t need it then…

This is funny because I made the same pact with a new cubicle neighbour a few years back - can’t remember why but I was just like, let’s not bother saying that to each other and she agreed. I’m all for extending that pact with all of Western Society.

How very Christian of you to point out your own flaws, promise to change your ways, while simultaneously and viciously attacking those who have not yet reached your level of ‘enlightenment.’

whoa...full stop! Everybody who disagrees with progressives has to be a racist, bigoted, evil, small-minded person who refuses “to engage the wider world because it simply threatens them”.

I had to stop reading after two paragraphs of self-flagellation. I couldn’t even make it to the football picks because I kept seeing pieces of skin go flying off your back like this was Passion of the Christ or something.

Bring back wing windows too, damn it. And floor-mounted switches for the high-beams.

And then sue the tombstone company for not having an effective anti-pooping mechanism to stop you from doing it.

He was going two or three times the speed limit on city roads. His heirs shouldn’t get to sue anyone, they’re just lucky he didn’t manage to kill anyone not complicit in his reckless behavior.

This chick is a money grubbing Cee You Next Tuesday.

Why would anyone find themselves connected to a lie detector today?