And NBA are still the worst names. Over half are bad.
Magic is worse than Wizards.
Raptors are bad, but the Pelicans may be worse.
The fucking Heat. It’s not the Miami Fire, the team is named after a temperature. It could be the “Miami feeling that your house gets when you turn off your A/C and leave for a weekend”.
And…

First, Padre’s and Brewers are objectively good names.

Instead of bitching about it maybe share one if it matters so much to you.

he was a “great captain” because every front-running mouth-breather who grew up in the 90's couldn’t wait to hitch their wagon to the next marketable “star”

It’s a play on words. They ask you “If I can tell you where you got your shoes, you gotta give me $5.” They’re implying they know where you bought the shoes. And so the joke is “you got your shoes...on your feet”. And then you’ve been had. Turns out, every street begging asshole in New Orleans tells this joke. It’s…

Poor Sultan McDoom - any other year, and he’d have been winner for certain. He’s like the 1990s Utah Jazz - a great team that would have been a dynasty in any other decade that didn’t include Jordan’s Bulls.

I know this sounds cold, but unless they’re in a Santa suit and ringing a bell, never give anyone on the street money, change or the folding kind.

‘when you get him, don’t bang his head on the concrete. Don’t bang his head. Don’t bang his head.’”

Duh, we’ve all watched spongebob. 🙄

I do not think Grandma’s had the 3.8, it was pretty gutless. She did let me borrow it to drive to Ozzfest ‘99 with a group of friends, so thanks Granny! My Grandpa’s Park Avenue did have the 3.8 and it was a solid engine. It had enough power, and he drove it to about 200k miles.

Yeah, I mean, if one of the main reasons you did a ‘nice’ thing was so someone could thank you for it, you’re doing it for the wrong reasons, and possibly not that nice.

I recently cleaned up my garage and added a stereo so I can drink and hang out in there. This past Friday night, all my friends cancelled on plans for the night (and wife was sleeping), so I had a garage party by myself, complete with classic rock, miller lites and a fat bowl. Garage solo drinking is the way to go.

Amen. I can relax with one when she’s there, but then the questions start coming when I go for a 2nd or 3rd. Yes, I really do need another, thank you for asking.

I’m really disappointed to learn you can’t change your own wiper blades. It’s a 30 second job, and fresh blades are $10 for the pair at Costco. Man up, Drew.

Mets fan here. Thoroughly enjoyed that run because it was awesome. Murphy hit like 43 home runs in the playoffs. Thor took no shit from anybody.

This looks like a fantastic sell-low opportunity for the Mets.

Oh great. You clowns found Jalopnik. There goes the last sanctuary I had from mindless political hatred. Nothing like coming to a car enthusiast site to talk about Trump.

I own a 6th gen Camaro.
I truly believe that one of the reasons it isn’t selling well has to do with the advertising.
Chevrolet is so stupid. They create a potent sports coupe that pretty much trounces the competition; they win the “car of the year” award from motor trend. They release the ZL1 which is an absolute…

However, the sexual assault during the Red Wings game did not occur between periods.

You are SO wrong (in my best LeChiffre voice)!!!