I imagine this for myself while walking through my house and stepping over my dogs who will not, in fact, get out the way.

Perhaps it’s our equipment picking up muffled songs because they’re garbled by all the plastic and trash we dump into their home.

As someone with a shit bio-mother, I salute you.

Much obliged, kind stranger.

It’s a Lewis Black joke, he overheard the phrase in public and has forever wondered what it meant.  Much like I might with the details of your... circumstance.

Inside a massive Lincoln Navigator, with a very tiny man.

Let’s be honest now, “sex lol” is a thing with which we’re all familiar.  <3 

“If it wasn’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college”  ... don’t do us like that.  

Was it really that unhinged, though? Like... put your fucking phone away, there are literally signs that say “No Phones, No Filming” ... Tampon Longshanks’ heinously wrong misinterpretation aside... I don’t blame him?

He’s very proud.

Yep. Still there. Progress is... slow.  :)

Fun fact: My husband parks in that very same car park at work. On the same floor. Intentionally.

I hate that this is true.

Seriously. Headline: “Breaking:  Hollywood Father Compliments Daughter In Normal Way, more at 11"

Also wine is delicious. 

I’ve tried this. Typically I’ve found the response is to simply wash their own clothing, feel like a hero, brush aside the squalor and literally ignore it because they don’t think enough of themselves to have a personal set of standards until it comes time to judge someone else. My husband once set me away to “relax”…

“A Hero is any man who does his job.”  - John Mulaney

I wonder... does your comment count as legal precedent for royalties when they name their show exactly this?

No you don’t understand - then everyone clapped and gave her $100%!

She was talking to me .... obviously