Why are people like this? They sure seem to notice “rudeness and imposition” when it happens at THEIR house. I’m straight up putting my foot down when they decide to “come help” by sitting in their phones and silently judging my parenting while they barely interact with the people they came to “visit” - and all of…

Don’t be romanced by his remorse. You’re worth more than that.

I mean it doesn’t hurt that staying home is literally my favorite thing to do, regardless of circumstance, so it’s an easy sell in my case. :)

This “hotel” thing is something I recently learned I’m implementing next visit after the bullshit my in-laws pulled the last time they were here.

Fellow hashimoto’s haver, here. Fuck these people, it’s not your main source of income, it’s way more stress than it’s worth for people who refuse to respect something as basic as your health, save your spoons. You’ll need them tomorrow. Also, research and ADVOCATE for your thyroid care and do NOT let doctors feed you…

I have one of those “friends” - this is a ploy. Even if her dog is dying and she wants attention (which is fair and fine), the fall-out in the aftermath of you “never being enough” will cycle back around in a few months. I know it sucks to not reach out with kindness, and feels wrong. But these are sharks, and you’re…

Yes. I have in-laws, and a phone loving, well meaning yet completely irresponsible sister in law. My solution was to unapologetically say “I’m sorry, I’m just not ready to leave my new baby yet. It’s not you, please don’t take it personally, I’m just not ready. Let’s netflix and pizza! AND WINE!” That works for me.…

I believe this means I can also start drinking at 3, instead of 6.

My SAD lamp might be keeping me alive, because I am a sad person. I love it! I also love sweaters and boots, but wish it were light out for longer to show off said attire. Pro tip: start drinking when the sun goes down. Also can someone tell my kids about the new time shift because they’re no longer convinced that…

Aw cookies, I believe in you.  <3 

I believe that.  I’m still sticking with my pre-lit skinny tree.  Fake, just like Jesus!

i mean ok but they’re toxic to animals, yes?

you guys.  when he was a boy, gaston ate four dozen eggs every morning to help him get large.  now that he’s grown he eats FIVE dozen eggs and he’s roughly the size of a barge.  come.  on.  that’s like.... sixty eggs.

I’ll see your boomer theory, and raise you “emotional and intellectual laziness with a side of self-aggrandizing inner monologue.”

Why are there so many of us?  

“Hey Dad, do you still have the Hermes scarf I left there for safe-keeping? Thanks so much for holding it for me, I’d really like to get the serial information off the item so I can register it with Hermes, and include it in my renter’s insurance policy. I’m so grown up! ... Dad? Hello?”

Uh, you can send that shit my way, that’s like a $400 scarf. Alternatively, you should have wrapped it around your head in a crumply wad, thanked them for the sweet head wrap and watched the fancy lady’s head explode.  

That’s beautiful. Have you asked her for a piece of her art as a gift?  That’s not meant to be snarky - I only ask because I’m a photographer and I try my hardest to give thoughtful, personal gifts, to occasionally hear “oh, I would have loved a framed photo of X” ... ok, awesome, but you have to tell me. I have no…

Mine just passive aggressively stomps around the house looking bewildered and perturbed, making sure he walks in front of me at least 5 times to perform his confusion that’s apparently my fault until I ask him what’s wrong.

HOLY SHIT, ECOSYSTEMS NEED SWAMPS. SWAMPS ARE COOL. DC IS BUILT ON AN ACTUAL SWAMP. I HATE THIS STUPID FUCKING METAPHOR.