I live one county to the west of Cleveland and about 30 minutes from dowtown. What is this strange odd feeling that I’m experiencing? It sort of feels like very confused optimism. Oh wait, it’s gone.

Way to fuck up the Browns draft position, Mayfield.

What a shit show 2018 is, and I know the Browns winning one game isn’t much, but I dig it, and it made me happy, and that’s what we want from sports.

31 year olds shouldn’t be friends with 14 year olds, that’s weird as fuck, full stop. If that’s all it is, simply friendly advice, it’s still weird as all get out and we should be shaming Drake for it. 

I think it’s Andy Kaufman.

Maybe it was meant for Bobby Brown and he got the wrong Twitter account.

It was Bob Zmuda

No way, he’s too old for this shit!

By not giving a damn about any laws but the laws of physics, baby.

Wow, another couple interviews like this and he might develop some heart attack-adjacent issues that require him to spend more time with his family until the Notre Dame job opens up. 

Technically this particular origin is THE first origin story ever written about the Joker

“I gotta believe that’s intentional!”

I mean... I think your first sentence is maybe going a bit far, but you’re definitely onto something.

Not sure if this needs pointing out but:

Charlie’s vaguely British accent he puts on whenever he’s trying to be fancy never fails to make me laugh.

I’m pretty sure these are the guys that Kit Harrington wants in a Marvel movie.

This is why the firm is going under.

... there’s no H.R. department or union rep to save your bacon.

what’s up with the “my dear”? seems a bit patronizing