Burn it to the ground. 

Thank you for your service. 

That parking lot though...

The John Daly Award

So Melania is the new Nancy. I guess “Be Best” is her “Just Say No.” Wait, no — “I Don’t Really Care” is her “Just Say No.”

To her credit, MM did have some negative shit to say after the Helsinki episode. Not trying to be an apologist, just recognizing that she does have the (rare) capacity to be reasonable. 

Democrats began repeatedly shouting the name of the country in which they live.

“Rose, you’re a little young and naive to think that once you live to be my age — assuming this planet still exists by then, hopefully we can solve our body heat problem — that you won’t be a sellout who belittles your youthful, fact-wielding opposition simply for being youthful and fact-wielding. Grow up, sweetie. And…

Right out of the John Oliver playbook.

Sarah, bring back the smokey eye!

+1 food service burn

+1

We are doing very well, and we are doing very well[.]

where the Republican party’s priorities are

Totally not a big deal, right? Everything’s fine. 

DORK.

Morad wants to launch a program called Kinderguardians, in which he introduces children between the ages of 3 and 16 to “pistols, rifles, semi-automatics, and a rudimentary knowledge of mortars.”

Does anyone here have a spare length of rope? Say, six feet long? Asking for a friend.

What the fuck are “greeno lives”?