This joke will never not be funny.

My bad. Maybe I need to give the innerwebs a rest today. I'm clearly in over my head.

"You're not making my penis hard anymore when I look at you and also I assume your husband no longer finds you attractive since we are basically the same person. You need to fix that right away, also publish a bunch of columns about it so I can tell you if you're doing it correctly."

It's a gamergate joke. Don't worry, everyone skim reads now and then :)

Are you ok?

That is all.

"I'm happily married with a baby and a great career, life couldn't be better! Better check my email.... *RECORD SCRATCH* OMIGOD, some rando in his eighties dislikes my "ballooning" figure! OH GOD IT'S ALL MEANINGLESS I'M WORTHLESS UNLESS HE APPROVES ME!"

Find my scrotum, I dare ya.

Um, actually it's not about his penis. It's about ethics in journalism.

I love that the writer is convinced that the loss of a spot in a creepy old (several decades, really guy?) perv's fap file means she'll immediately hop to it and lose a bunch of weight. WHY are all men convinced that we give a fuck whether or not they want to fuck us? Particularly when we aren't even single? Like, if…

"I better hurry and tell all the ladies in the world what my penis thinks of them, so they can base their self-worth around it! You're welcome, ladies."

Emma Watson:

You're curious? Seriously?!

You clearly do not know anything about employment law or public relations.
He was not fired illegally.
His "interesting and honest" post was crafted by about a hundred professionals and probably cost him more than you've made in the past two years.

Had to make a burner for this.

Ah, so I'm not the only one.

Damn. Anytime I see the words "rough sex" my mind goes straight back to the "preppy killer." How convenient of an excuse it always is.

A+.

I'm thinking that could be a really effective way to get laid in the right circumstances.

So THIS is why she's called Amanda fucking Palmer.