This is what I see when I hear that song:

I definitely need to do a Facebook friend purge, since I’ve spent most of the morning pointing out that, no, Lena Dunham wasn’t a teenager when she “molested” her one-year-old sister, nor does that have anything to do with the Duggar situation. They’re desperate to find a way to justify and rationalize. It nauseates…

My coworkers and I got takeout sushi and gathered around a large conference table to eat. The newest employee, Joe, had never had sushi before, and we were stunned to see him put a huge wad of wasabi in his mouth. Someone finally had the presence of mind to yell, “No!” But unfortunately, it was too late to save Joe—he…

There’s a great documentary, 112 Weddings, that underscores the fact that a wedding isn’t a marriage. As you pointed out, it’s simply the party prefacing the marriage. The documentary follows a wedding photographer who goes back years later and revisits the couples whose weddings he shot. It was interesting to see…

Diagnosing? What do you think you are, a real doctor?

I looked at the history too, and with 30 comments posted yesterday alone, there’s clearly a bit of a double standard going on. Guess you’ll only be deemed an attention whore if you comment 31 or more times.

Holy shit! I saw the original attack on adultosaur and the “fake doctor” insult and kept returning throughout the day to monitor the situation. For some reason, I never saw the conversation you linked to, so thanks for that—my curiosity is assuaged. What a nasty, nasty troll.

I’ve been searching for a new forever-stylist ever since mine moved away after 15 years of styling my hair. I’ve been to six so far and just haven’t found the right fit. The most recent one I tried didn’t make the cut (ha!) because she had a lot to say but was a mumbler. I had to ask her to repeat things, strained to…

Because I clearly have no life and spend my time thinking about has-been actresses, I’ve been curious about this since she took up residence in London: What happens if she doesn’t complete her hours and won’t voluntarily return to the US? Does the British government get involved and revoke her passport or something?…

Ditto. I think her Belle Meade dress is a tip-off as to where she spends time. That or Green Hills—she strikes me as old money, not nouveau riche. I doubt Brentwood is tony enough for her.

It looked much like this, except with clock hands above Jesus’s head:

Your icon is marginally better than the painted-on-black-velvet picture of the Last Supper my coworker received as a wedding gift. Even worse, it wasn’t merely a painting—someone had modified it and turned it into a clock. The last time I saw this travesty, it was residing in a place of honor behind the clothes dryer…

Relevant:

Pregnant was my guess, too. I base that on the fact that when I was pregnant, I had to have a Burger King Whopper drowned in mustard every single day. And I'm not exaggerating. I'd ask for extra, extra mustard on the burger, then request a minimum of 15 packets and add those to it. There was not enough mustard in the…

I can't stop wondering how she sat down in it.

It’s the save-the-date of politics.

I always called them laughingstocks, mainly because it pissed my sister off since they were her favorite shoe. I was a child of the 70s but wore mostly platform shoes back then. You know, to go with my Nehru jacket. (God, what was I thinking?)

Sorry, I can see how my lede was confusing. He was awarded a ton of money in an unrelated lawsuit, which is how he could finally afford to buy a Porsche.

Your daughter sounds grounded and amazing, no small feat considering what kids are up against these days. I talk to my granddaughter lots and feel good about who she is. But she lives in another state, so my influence is limited. Her mom’s not exactly a paragon of stability and her dad—my son—also lives far from her…

Cringing for you. I have a granddaughter who will 12 soon and my heart breaks in advance for her. Kids are so cruel, as you can attest, and I hope she’s spared humiliation like you endured. Conversely, I sincerely hope she’s not cruel herself. (She’s a sweetie and I can’t really see that, but I’m not exactly…