Rafael Palmeiro!

Jesus Christ. Does she remember banging Hack Wilson after a heavy night of drinking and doing the Charleston?

My mom 100% would’ve left my dad for Mark Grace.

Oh man, my Dad sure loves a twist ending. Best way to finish, in my opinion.

My grandfather died without ever having seen the cubs win the world series. So, my Dad, ever the crazy asshole he is, brought a radio out on the porch so gramps could listen in from heaven. We all thought he was going out there to jack off, but nope he was going out there to be with his Dad, which I thought was sweet.…

Now hold on one damn minute, our beer selection doesn’t suck. I can live with other criticisms. But that’s crossing the line.

Unless that’s the name of a South Park or Simpsons episode, I’m going to guess, no, no one.

+1 ethnic cleansing

But your ballpark beer selection sucks ass.

Good news! You can use these same photos in your future article about the Wahoo logo being removed.

\begin Harry Carry Impression

It takes a special kind of self-importance to, in 2016, say to yourself, “I know blackface is *usually* really offensive but it will totally not be when *I* do it.”

Grew up in Chicago. Now live in Seattle. Am a cubs fan.

I’m gonna treasure this moment of enjoying this mostly likable organization for now, because I know for the next ten years, I’ll be cursing this franchise into oblivion while drunkenly yelling at all of the pink hat-wearing Cubs “fans” that walk through the turnstiles of a Mariners-A’s game.

How do you read an autobiography about race and racial bias and be so moved by it you decide to be completely racist???

Nah, it actually wasn’t. Cleveland losses are hapless endeavors that grab defeat from the jaws of victory (see: the Browns). The Indians were dogged tonight. They fought hard.

All I hear is fireworks and car horns.

Some perspective on how historic this is: