What will happen to America? What about our children? What will happen to future generations without more Lena Whatshernameham?

A mystery: why I read an article about two lousy brands I know little and care nothing about.

Won't someone please put that sonofabitch in jail until he writes the final two books?

So, you made it almost all the way through the "A" titles before you gave up.

They had their problems, but the Athenian legal system was pretty great, especially compared to everyone else's.

Thanks for the reminder… I've gotta find a pie to eat before I have dinner.

I haven't seen this movie in more than ten years, but I thought it was great.

If by classy you mean he's thinking about killing her, then yeah.

"…a conscience-free droid having the power to decide who lives and who dies."

Add Bill Murray to the journalist list for Groundhog Day.

A lot of those kids are aspiring creative writers.

Twin Peaks. My wife and I were completely mesmerized for the first season, and then it just went off the rails and over the falls. We kept watching to the bitter end, but we often asked ourselves, why are we still here?

My favorite is The Bishop's Wife. He and Loretta Young make you root for celestial adultery.

Jesse Eisenberg? Was Jonah Hill unavailable?

We need way more self-absorbed, narcissistic, only vaguely on-point blog entries. The Internet has way too few of those.

Australia also calls it soccer, or, more appropriately, that girlie game.

The Grammys have always been irrelevant. But it used to be much worse when they ignored great music and rewarded the crap. Now it's pretty much all crap, so they have kind of caught up to the culture.

It would be much more impressive if they would blow him underwater.

Is Nicole Kidman is playing Grace Kelly's body double?

Plus one. As a bonus, there are a hundred cheap ways to bring him back when you need him again.