I want to see James Urbanik shaved first.

Shit just got real, then.

@Yeah. Maybe you were talking in your sleep and saying something really dumb.

A lot of people would say that's a half empty glass, Tilden.

Luckily…
No animals were harmed during the filming of the "belly flop" scene. Although the actor was killed.

I was kind of hoping…
that someone would pick up one of the teenager douchebag guys and beat the other one to death with him, much like Jason did to the two campers in the holodeck in "Jason X". Then maybe someone could take the girl teenager out to a very nice seafood dinner and then not call her.

Shiloh Coke. Which is much better than Blackie Highway 124.

I liked Jolene Blalock on Enterprise. My favorite episode was the one where she went into the Pon'Far and spent the entire 45 minutes fellating her tricorder. You just don't see tv like that anymore.

jws has ruled in favor of El Santo. Absent other votes, I formally rescind my version and offer my apologies to El Santo informally now, and by affidavit later.

@El Santo: I think that would have been funnier if you said, "One will be gay, the other… about the same amount of gay."

Maybe he sailed up to a Blockbuster and raked them amidships with his 24-pounders. Which sounds a lot dirtier than it should.

Half Irish? Wasn't his mom Italian? (Or am I getting him confused with Jimmy, who was half Irish?)

Lifetime pass for "Galaxy Quest".

Letterman had the best line, back during the last late night debacle. "Having a show on at 2:30 is a lot like not having a show on at all."

@The Information: I like your style with the parenthetical reveal. I'm going to start using that all the time. Like this one time I was at the mall and this old lady asked me to help her with her bags and I screamed, "Fuck you old lady! I hope you die!" (It was my mom.)

Okay, I'm pretty sure you're making most of those names up.

I always thought it was set in Kansas.

But…
but… how will we tell them apart?

You're a funny guy, CBS.

Only if she bought her a drink first.