I'd amend that to "No comedy (not written-directed by Edgar Wright) should ever be more than 100 minutes long, ever."

Then it wouldn't matter if it didn't look like complete garbage, you wouldn't see it anyway.

John Slattery needs money to buy boats, cocaine, and cocaine boats just like the rest of us.

This review could have just been the sentence "This movie is 116 minutes long", and it would be just as convincing in its arguments against this movie. There's no reason on Earth that the movie where the teddy bear makes dick jokes and references movies needs to be five minutes shy of No Country for Old Men's running…

Well, you got to mention Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex*, so this wasn't an especially pointless endeavor, I guess.




*But Were Afraid to Ask

I hope that, before every action scene, they show him putting on the suit, pan over to some other area, and by the time he's back in front of the camera and in the suit, he's suddenly insanely ripped.

Yeah, he makes Tobey Maguire look like a steroid-abusing brute in comparison.

Looking at his Wikipedia page, he was in that tsunami movie with Naomi Watts and Ewan McGregor, but more to the point, he's young, British, and impossibly white-bread.

I WILL CONTINUE TO MOCK JAI COURTNEY AS LONG AS HE KEEPS HIS STUPID NAME AND CONTINUES TO BE BLAND IN EVERY MOVIE HE'S IN WHILE ACKNOWLEDGING THAT HE APPARENTLY HAS SKILLS THAT HE'S JUST PUT TO EXCEPTIONALLY POOR USE (SEE: CHARLIE HUNNAM).

Man, Roger Moore's Bond movies got really weird.

My contributions to trivia may be minimal, but I am making great progress in fitting in Evita references whenever possible.

The first trailer for Sicario

Brandon didn't even mention what sounds like one of the worst parts of Trudy Tective S2

I've heard good things about his last film, The Hole, but this sounds like he was so desperate to make a movie that he literally picked a script out of a hat and filmed it regardless of quality.

Keith brings the shithammer down on Joe Dante's latest film

Hell, The Knick was better and will continue to be better.

Yayyy!!!! My World of Flops was the thing that brought me to this site in the first place, and it's fantastic that it's back, although the circumstances that led to it coming back are not-so-fantastic.

He's the second Community cast member to work with Soderbergh, after Joel McHale. This fact was a lot more fun in my head.

Goddamnit, Mohd is commenting semi-regularly on The Dissolve now.

…yes.