avclub-f44ec26e2ac3f1ab8c2472d4b1c2ea86--disqus
TuxedoMonkey
avclub-f44ec26e2ac3f1ab8c2472d4b1c2ea86--disqus

I dunno, twice as funny as Law & Order sounds about right for Leno.

Cheap Humor
If I try to skip around in the first video by dragging the bar on the timeline, it goes to "see how thick it is" regardless of where I release the cursor.

I like to think so. It's also interesting how the lizard baby is such a cultural touchstone for a generation.

Gigantor!
Bigger than big, taller than tall,
Quicker than quick, stronger than strong.
Ready to fight for right, against wrong.

That "I have a day or two left" line struck me as a red flag that Day 8 might be the search for a cure. Of course he would need Kim or her daughter to get the cure, so we have an excuse for Kim to get kidnapped yet again.

Exposition Much?
I halfway convinced my fiancee that Jack was grumpy, sweating, and asking to leave the room because he hadn't taken a crap in 20 hours. Of course she started it by asking if the show was rated "V" for having lizard babies.

Too late, my poo has been flung.

Whatever. I saw the monkey-fighting clip one good dawn time.
No, I do not live in LA. I have visited several times, but I can't stand the place.

It's only a matter of time until she GOOPs.

I have had it with these Monday to Friday snakes!

Obligatory Reference
An A-minus makes it one of the best movies ever made? Why, that's only one notch above the lowest grade imaginable: an A-minus-MINUS!

If L&O is canceled, who will rip things from the headlines?

If stupid Nebraska weren't in the way, I would go.
*shakes fist at Nebraska*

Exactly what I wondered, because I was too lazy to click the links.
It's the same metropolitan area at any rate.

We don't want to panic the general population, so let me state this as clearly as possible. Americans may safely continue to get all freaky-deeky in the way that makes America the greatest country in the world. We only ask that, as a temporary precaution, you refrain from going ass-to-mouth until further information

Hey, don't knock lizard burritos. I always get them at Q'Doba.

Fair enough, it wasn't an American citizen, but they did die here. It was one or two days ago, so I'm wondering what kind of news station you're listening to.

You have no chance to survive make your time.

Suicide Club taught me that Japanese schoolgirls are really just high-pressure blood balloons. The rolls of skin are creepy as hell, too.

Right, only Americans are people. Though one American has died from it, so you're still wrong.