MAAAAAAAAAAAATLOOOOOOOOOOOCK!

"I think President Clinton is doing a great job—and so is her husband! You like that, Branford?"

I'm pretty sure I saw this on my best friend's 10th birthday. I think the general consensis was we should have gone to see Disorderlies instead.

That's the one that takes place at the fancy hotel in the desert, right? Even as a young Christie fanatic, I found it pretty awful. The one good touch was having Orson Wells be the mysterious voice. The 1989 version that takes place at some African camp was pretty lousy as well, even if the cast was slightly better…

I think in current releases of the book, the island they're all stranded on is no longer Indian Island or, um…That Word Island, but Soldier Island, complete with toy solders that mysteriously disappear when someone gets knocked off.

Shhh…you kid, but it really isn't hard to imagine some executive thinking "Hey, we could make them all college students! A law student, a med student, a couple from the wrong side of the tracks, an uptight prude, an ROTC cadet, a sexy babysitter, a bad boy who likes adventure, and, instead of the detective, maybe a…

Congrats to Cheerios for jumping on the gluten-free bandwagon while acting like they were the first to think it up!

Remember when Ricky Gervais was awesome and not horribly annoying?

And the Emmy for Best Acceptance Speech in a Musical goes to…

So is Rob Lowe discussing losing his gig to a bunch of NFL players who aren't even home on Sundays to watch NFL Sunday Ticket?

To be fair, the questions that Terry Bradshaw asks can't be any more inane than the questions celebs are usually asked on the red carpet.

I'll admit to being morbidly curious about this, so I turned it on about 20 minutes in, only to find Gloria Gaynor singing "I Will Survive" while surrounded by dancers on roller skates. For a moment, I wondered if NBC was accidentally broadcasting an old episode of Donny & Marie. If NPH wants to bring the variety…

Let's not forget Forrest Gump, Mrs. Doubtfire, Hancock, Juno, Salt, Rocky, Arthur, Norbit, and Shrek (though at least some of them, I really would like to forget).

When I visited Chicago in June, I thought it was the most awesome place I've ever been and wondered why I didn't move there after I graduated from high school. I was cured of the notion that Chicago was in any way a decent place to live when I visited in January.

With very few exceptions, The Simpsons has almost no continuity from one episode to another, especially early on, so you can pretty much start with any episode and watch them randomly in any order. If you want the absolute gold standard, I'd start with Season 4, but you can't really go wrong with all of Season 3,…

The closest they'll probably come to taking revenge is in At Long Last Leave, when Marge and Homer finally tells off everyone in town.

I would say that Another Simpsons Clip Show was easily their laziest, least interesting clip show. I don't really have a big problem with All Singing. I'll concede that the family and Snake singing through all of the wraparound clips can be a bit grating, but Paint Your Wagon is such a hysterical start to the show…

Haha…don't worry. As I recall, Ondre managed to find something to hate about just about every later-season episode…assuming that I do recall anything from my time on a.t.s., which may or may not have ever happened.

My college roommate was an even bigger musicals nerd than I was, and if nothing else, I'm grateful for him introducing me to Sondheim. Listening to his copy of the Company cast album, I was shocked that the guy I had grown up watching in all those Disney comedies was the star of this very adult musical. It's a shame…

The fact that Coogan was in Night at the Museums 2&3 sort of indicates that can't be true. I don't think Ben Stiller is the most powerful man in Hollywood or anything, but I suspect that, if he didn't want an actor to play a relatively small part in either film, he could have found a way to ensure that said actor…