The idea of Donald Trump not caring what people think about him might actually be less terrible.

Ooh, that reminds me of California's Gubernatorial Election!

You want a thumb? I can get you a thumb. Believe me. There are ways, dude. You don't want to know about them, believe me. Hell, I can get you a thumb by three o'clock this afternoon, with nail polish!

Leonard's bullshit excuse was worth it to have him come around with "inspiration came to me by way of the FCC's Equal Time Amendment" and unveil a second, competing totem pole.

We can keep Miami Vice.

It would, if anybody wanted it.

Ayuh.

It's not separate from the rest of the United States; it's just separate from the rest of Michigan.

Average Joe is a 35.4 year old American Male of mixed German and Irish descent who lives in Pennsylvania for statistical purposes, in a mid-range suburb. Maybe Ohio. He has a brunette wife and 2.5 children, works an unspecific white collar job, drives a mid-range sedan, receives 14 vacation days per year, and receives…

Wait, is the United States in a personal union with another country? Did Trump buy some micronation in the 80s in a failed tourism scheme?

I'm resisting the urge to celebrate by showing American History X to my very sensitive Jewish mother.

Next month I am leaving the United States to settle down in my ancestral homeland, which is literally on the brink of war with Russia and has a PM under three separate criminal corruption investigations, and totally not regretting it.

Screenplay by George R.R. Martin.

This is not over! Bears!

GAHT EH PENNY?

I can never tell how much drama on that site is real, and how much is made up in the minds of commenters and 4chan users. I suspect it's 97% the latter.

And for not saying "Genesee" for Genesis.

The legion of followers who literally worship him certainly did.

James Franco is a million times more likable than Jared Leto. At the very least, he knows when he's being an annoying douche.

Maybe Johnny is vampire.